19 Jul LASHON HARA
Some may argue
that lashon hara is
the worst aveirah
of the Torah. As
the Gemara
(Yoma 9:) writes,
“ the, aveirah
of baseless hatred [and lashon hara] is
equivalent to the three cardinal aveiros of
idolatry, adultery, and murder.” And the
Ohr HaChaim (Vayikra 14:9) writes,
“Nothing distances a person from Hashem
as lashon hara does.” Yet, people do not
consider it to be so severe. In people’s
minds, lashon hara is from the minor
aveiros. If someone purposely gave you
non-kosher food to eat, you would be
angry at that person forever. You would
never forgive him. But when someone
speaks lashon hara to you, you forgive
him. He can do it so many times, and you
don’t hate him because of it. The Chofetz
Chaim discusses this and shows how
people don’t take this aveirah seriously.
The Vilna Gaon zt’l explains that every
mitzvah has a mazal. From all the
mitzvos, lashon hara has the worst mazal,
because it isn’t considered so grave in
people’s eyes. A sign of tzaraas is a white
hair in the wound (see Vayikra 13:10).
White generally represents purity, but by
tzaraas, white indicates tumah. This tells
us that when one is white and righteous
in all his ways if he isn’t cautious with his
speech, he is tamei. It is appropriate to
discuss the severity of lashon hara at this
time of year when we find ourselves once
again in the Three Weeks because the
Beis HaMikdash was destroyed due to
lashon hara.
Lashon Hara’s Arrows
I met a seventy-year-old bachelor in
Meron who is an alcoholic. He comes
from a respected Yerushalmi family, but
his life was shattered. He told me his
story: He was engaged to be married
when he was in his high twenties, which
was late considering the community he
came from, and his fiancé was of a
similar age. Two weeks before the
chasunah, a relative of the kallah told
her, “I learned with your chasan in
yeshiva. I just don’t understand; you
waited all this time to get married to
him?” She picked up on the
condescending tones, and one thing led
to the next until she decided that she
doesn’t want to marry him. When the
chasan heard that the shidduch was off,
he packed a few belongings and moved
to Meron. He’s been there ever since,
drowning his problems with his constant
drinking. All of this was the result of one
word of lashon hara. The following is
another story that shows what a word of
lashon hara can cause: There’s a young
man who is slightly slow and somewhat
“different,” but apparently, his wife and
in-laws are not so bright either, and they
didn’t realize it. They were pleased with
him. One erev Shabbos, the father-in-law
came to a bus stop, seeking someone
traveling to the area where his daughter
and son-inlaw lived so that he could send
them a package. He found a bachur
waiting for a bus to that city, and the
father-in-law described his
son-in-law to the bachur, so he
would know where he should deliver
the package. The bachur replied,
“Oh, that meshugener (insane
person)? I know him. No problem.”
Just one word of lashon hara, and it
caused so much harm. The
father-in-law didn’t want his
daughter to be married to a
meshugener, and he convinced her
to demand a divorce. Once, the
Chofetz Chaim’s front door was left
open, and a cow walked in and
began to do damage. After the cow
was led out of the house and things
calmed down, the Chofetz Chaim
said to his rebbetzin and his family,
“What lesson can we learn from
what happened? In a practical sense,
we must keep the front door closed,
so a cow won’t come in again. And if
the door is open and a cow comes in,
we must be careful that the cow
doesn’t break anything. And this is a
lesson for shemiras halashon: We
should keep the entrance of our
mouths closed and avoid speaking
lashon hara. And when we speak, we
must be extremely cautious that we
don’t harm anyone with our speech.”
Chazal (Bava Basra 34:) writes, 3
The . Rebbe of
Zemigrad zt’l translates these words
as follows: , .mute a is
whoever acts as if he is mute when it
comes to speaking lashon hara, ,
this person is a man, an ,as a
human being should be. As it states
89.), Chulin(
What, “
is man’s profession in this world?
He should
pretend that he’s a
mute.” Let us
become an ,a
human being, and
avoid speaking
lashon hara,
which harms
p e o p l e
n e e d l e s s l y .
Parnassah and
Success
The Sefer HaKanah says that tzaraas
exists in our generation, only it has a
different appearance. In these days,
tzaraas is poverty. In contrast, guarding
one’s speech is mesugal for parnassah.
The Chofetz Chaim (Shemiras
HaLashon vol.2 ch.7) writes, “When I
think about it, I am shocked: To earn
parnassah, people seek segulos and they
go to tzaddikim to receive brachos.
However, all segulos and brachos won’t
help them if they speak lashon hara
because speaking lashon hara brings
curses and not blessings. As it states in
the Torah Devarim (
24:27),’ ,Cursed are those who
smite their fellow man in concealment’
[and this refers to speaking lashon hara
about one’s fellow man]. This curse
wasn’t said by just one person. It was
said with the approval of the entire
Jewish nation, together with the kohanim
and the levi’im. And the curse prevents
him from receiving Hashem’s bounty. If
people would listen to me, I advise them
to be very cautious with their words, and
they will find blessing in their livelihood.
This counsel is better than all segulos.”
Guarding one’s speech has many other
benefits besides parnassah. It is a segulah
for health, long life, and success. As the
Chofetz Chaim (Chovas HaShemirah 6)
writes, “The ideal segulah is to guard
one’s speech. As it who,
,states wants to live in Olam and,
,HaBa he loves to
live a good life in this world, the counsel
is your guard, speech.
This is the ultimate segulah for success
in both worlds.” Guarding one’s speech
will also help him in the world to come.
The Chofetz Chaim (Kvod Shamayim
1:10) teaches that in heaven, Hakadosh
Baruch Hu will refuse to listen to the
mekatrigim (malachim who speak lashon
hara on him) because he didn’t slander
and speak lashon hara on others. As we
see, there are many benefits gained from
guarding the speech. And the greatest
reward of all is that we have the privilege
to give pleasure to Hashem – and there is
no greater joy than that! It states (Shir
HaShirim 1:2), Yismach The.
Moshe explains that
means kiss me, and is
when one purses his lips tightly. Hashem
says that it is like we kiss with when,
,Hashem we close our
mouths and refrain from speaking
forbidden speech.