01 Nov SPEAK YOUR VUES WITH THE VUES MASTER
Please note that the author of Speak Your Vues is in no way affiliated with the publisher of
this paper. The author of this column is an independent third party contributor. The views and
opinions expressed by this author may not reflect the views and opinions of the publishers. If
one has any issues with any of the views, please write a letter to the Vues Master.
FIGHTING ANTI SEMITISM
A group of fans sat courtside at a Nets-Pacers
game in Brooklyn wearing T-shirts reading
“Fight antisemitism.” Men in the group
wore yarmulkes. The display is an apparent
response to Nets guard Kyrie Irving, who
recently promoted an antisemitic movie on
his Twitter account. In his last meeting with
the media this past weekend, Irving stood by
his tweet and was combative with reporters
when asked about it. “I can post whatever
I want,” Irving said when asked by ESPN’s
Nick Friedell why he promoted the movie on
his social media. The Nets released a separate
statement that they” strongly condemn
and have no tolerance for the promotion of
any form of hate speech.” The NBA then
released a statement on Sunday that “Hate
speech of any kind is unacceptable and runs
counter to the NBA’s values of equality, inclusion
and respect.” -Yahoo Sports Why do
the Brooklyn Nets keep this guy? He’s only
been a trouble maker. Yes, he has tremendous
talent. No one argues with that. But now he
is clearly an anti-semite!!! I don’t care how
much talent he has. Get rid of him.
Vues Master’s Note: This time he went over
the line! I love the picture & it’s a brilliant
move. Get rid of him. We don’t need a person
like him in Brooklyn or the NBA!!
INFLATION
Dear Vues Master:
Last week I went shopping in two different
local grocery stores & I couldn’t believe how
expensive a bag of romaine lettuce and one
honey dew were. They were both over $10
each. This inflation business is really driving
me crazy! When is it going to end?
KP
Vues Master’s Note: Inflation is here to stay
it will keep on growing until we get a Republican
White House and Republican Senate
and Congress!
ZELDIN
Dear Vues Master:
All the local rabbonim have backed Lee
Zeldin for governor because they think he
can help with the yeshivas. Can he really? Is
that his job?
KN
Vues Master’s Note: Of Course! The governor
appoints the education chancellor! But
more so, how about fighting anti-Semitic attacks
on a daily basis by imprisoning hate
crime perpetrators with high bail not springing
them out before thy have a chance to
contemplate their crimes. There is no cooling
period these violent criminals are back
on the street within eight hours of being arrested!
HOCHUL
Dear Vues Master:
Why does it feel that Governor Hochul has
been in hiding for the last month? Why has
she not been speaking to the orthodox media?
New York historically votes democratic
& it appears that she is losing ground everyday.
DR
Vues Master’s Note: Simple she does not
like us she is Cuomo’s protégé. Remember
during Covid how we were singled out? She
was part of the problem not the solution.
Look, is she doing something for the Yeshivos?
At least Zeldin claims he will help! That
is a start.
IDOLS
Dear Vues Master:
Do you think that we should care what Kanye West or Kyrie Irving think about Jewish people? I don’t even want to write this letter because I feel like I’m giving them the attention that they want. But who are they? Do I really care what a musician or a basketball player thinks? But can we just stay on the sideline when someone is an antisemite and just ignore them?
MK
Vues Master’s Note: Yes! Because many of our children follow these athletes and actors! We need to stop these attacks and let people know that the Holocaust could happen again!
HEIGHT
Dear Vues Master:
I’ve always been the shortest kid in my class. Both my parents are short people. New studies show that incomes rise for men for every inch of height by approximately $1000 per inch. Taller people also have higher average earnings for men and for women from the National Child Development Study (NCDS), a British birth cohort study of children born in 1958; the British Cohort Study (BCS), a birth cohort study of children born in 1970; and the Panel Study of Income Dynamics, a longitudinal study of U.S. households. (For both men and women, the relationship is striking: a one-inch increase in height is associated on average with a 1.4 percent to 2.9 percent increase in weekly earnings, and a 1.0 percent to 2.3 percent increase in average hourly earnings. The Thompson Elevator Shoe Company took these studies and rounded it off to $1000 per inch on average. Should I be worried that my children are going to have a hard time finding a shidduch because they are short & are bound to make less money than a tall person?
MB
Vues Master’s Note: My grandmother used to say that you got to be tall enough to reach the floor. There are ladders to make you taller but one can’t get shorter in any way! Everything is from Hashem he will take care of your children’s shidduchim!
LIARS
Dear Vues Master:
I never enjoyed politics. I honestly believe all politicians are corrupt. They all promise the world & rarely deliver. I think the system is really the issue. If someone gives a candidate money, isn’t it obvious that the candidate, if elected, will do everything to help that person or business. What about the little guy that can’t afford the donation to the candidate?
BL
Vues Master’s Note: At least the little guy is not disappointed when the politician messes up the rich donors! They never keep their word; they are almost as bad as shadchanim!
MULTIPLE WIVES
Dear Vues Master:
Your comment to my last letter is similar to what most men think of now in regards to marrying more than one wife. The common response to that idea is that “one wife is enough.” Yet, if someone had two wives he would only hear half of his wives drama than normal. If he had 4 wives he would only get 25% of it. Even then it would incentivize his wives to behave properly to get his time and not take him for granted like what happens to most men these days. Fellas, next time you get home from a long hard day at work would you rather have a wife who greets you at the door with a nice cold beer or one that scolds you the minute you walk through the door and demands you do 100% of the household chores two day ago ? Think about it.
AB
Vues Master’s Note: Or maybe you get scolded four times as much! They are called tzaros in the Gemara for a reason! We are not meant to handle multiple wives! As women are not apt to share a man it just causes tzaros!
YERUSHA AND TZEDAKA
Dear Vues Master:
Two poor brothers who lived on tzedakah were regular visitors to the Rothschild mansion where, once each month, they were given 100 marks each. When one of the brothers died, the other made the usual call alone. The family treasurer who disbursed funds to the poor handed him the usual 100 marks. “Excuse me,” he said, “where is the other 100?” The treasurer replied: “Your brother is dead. Your share is 100 marks.” “What do you mean, my share?” the schnorrer said. “Who is my brother’s heir – me or Rothschild?“
MK
Vues Master’s Note: I don’t know if my father in law in Yerushalayim promised me his route in the USA to collect money. He was very generous!
DOUBLE TALK
Dear Vues Master:
Eila Toldos Noach Noach These are the generations, leisure. The word noach means comfortable; doubling the word, noach-noach, amplifies it to mean very comfortable or leisure. For example, Dak means thin and Dak dak means very thin; similarly, gal means wave and gal gal means circle. With that in mind this is how to read the next parsha, Lech Lecha – (And G-d said) to Avram, hasten! Lach means “go to” and lach-lach means “go from.” To “go to” means going to something like making a goal; making a goal takes time and thought. However, to “go from” means going from something like a bad crowd; leaving a bad crowd should take no time and no thought. Another way of understanding the double wording is when we put all our eggs in our offspring we end up sit on our laurels and bring the flood; however, having alacrity, like Avraham, we role model and bring b’nai Yisrael.
DG
Vues Master’s Note: : I read this letter quickly!
LESSON
Dear Vues Master:
Every year, at this time, I recognize someone in the world who puts themselves on the line for others despite the repercussions. I call it the “Noach Award” because even according to the opinion that Noach was only great in his generation he’s still distinguished for breaking the ice, for being the first person to rebuke the public. Last year’s award was James O’Keefe of Project Veritas and this year it is Chaya Raichik of Libs of TikTok. With that said, here is an example of the challenges of doing the right thing. I went with my father-in-law to get his car back from Kings Auto Group Collision Center. We went with our wives as I expected they weren’t going to give the car back so easily. It took close to two hours, $1,500, raised voices and some body slamming into me before we got it out. We are going to file a complaint and get our money back. Let’s learn from Avraham and Chaya Raichik about, sur mira vasa tov, leave bad and do good. The first step to leave is always the hardest.
DG
Vues Master’s Note: Great opportunity to work on patience!
ELECTIONS
Dear Vues Master:
It seems that Israel has at least one election every year. I honestly do not understand their system at all. Do you think that the election process is better in America or Israel?
PN
Vues Master’s Note: Well that
would depend if you like going to
mekubalim for votes or to dead
people for votes. Both election
processes are flawed!
ISRAELI POLITICS
Dear Vues Master:
I’m writing this half in jest and half
in awe. Imagine for a minute you’re
the most skilled politician on Earth.
You know it’ll be decades before
anyone can even approach your skill
level. This isn’t ego or pride, it’s an
assessment of your competition.
You win election after election, and
know just what you can and can’t do
to stay in power. You lead successfully
for over a decade. No wars,
the economy skyrockets, and your
party consistently ranks at the top in
all polls. After a decade it becomes
a little tiresome. You’re not ready
to retire (that would be even more
boring), you love your country and
want to help it grow even more, but
you could use a break. Your house
is in disrepair but you don’t want to
live in a house undergoing a complete
restoration. A sabbatical would
be a dream. Yet, you know a sabbatical
for a world leader is out of the
question. What do you do? Can you
imagine if you were so good, so unbelievably
good, that you could actually
purposefully lose an election
by just enough to get yourself a one
year break and then orchestrate the
politics “just enough” to have another
election one year later…and…
after the country has bought you a
private plane, completely renovated
your house, and gone through just
enough division not to ruin the country
but cause the people to want you
to step back in, you begin earnestly
campaigning to return – refreshed
and ready for another twelve year
run? Welcome to Bibi 2.0
RUP
Vues Master’s Note: Ha! You wish
that was what he did! He lost last
election. Lost it to an incompetent
guy who is not even running again!
MAMA
Dear Vues Master:
This Shabbos is the yahrtzeit
of Rachel Imanu. Mama Rachel
was the quintessential mother.
Mama Rachel was the mother
of all Jews. Her life was one of
hardship, yet she rose above it
all. A true Jewish woman. Mama
Rachel was the mother of us all.
Do you think that she was the
most beloved woman in tanach?
It always bothered me that
she wasn’t buried with Yakov
at Maarat Hamachpela? Being
buried by herself, everyone goes
out of their way to visit her specifically.
FR
Vues Master’s Note: A Mother
knows best! And helps the most!
TROUBLE
Dear Vues Master:
A mother sternly said to her son: “I
received a note from your Rebbe
today.” “That’s OK Mom,” he responded.
“I promise I won’t tell
Dad.
DS
Vues Master’s Note: Are you more
scared of your father or your father
in heaven?
GRAVE MISTAKE
Dear Vues Master:
Two men in a graveyard noticed
an elegant marble Matzeiva upon
which was written outstanding
Praises about the deceased. One
of the men commented: “I never
knew that he was such a special
person.” The other responded: “I
knew him well. If he could read
these praises, he would think
that he was buried in the wrong
grave.”
RS
Vues Master’s Note: This is a
dead issue!
LANGUAGE
Dear Vues Master:
Mr. Friedman had dinner at a kosher
Chinese restaurant and was
surprised to hear the Chinese
waiter speaking to him in Yiddish.
On the way out, as he was paying
the bill, he said to the owner “The
food was great and having a Chinese
waiter who speaks Yiddish
was a special treat.” “Shhh! Not so
loud,” said the owner. “He thinks
we’re teaching him English.”
BF
Vues Master’s Note: But at least
the food was good! How was the
kishka?
BRACHA
Dear Vues Master:
What bracha would someone
make if they win the 1
billion dollar
Powerball lottery drawing?
FN
Vues Master’s Note: Any
bracha on any food he
wants! He now has enough
money to spend!
BAR MITZVAH
Dear Vues Master:
These days even in baal habatishe
circles the norm has become that
the music at a bar mitzvah be djs
playing club style music with
strobe lights flashing. It’s safe to
say that the origins of this type of
scene do not come from the Alte
Heim. Are there any rabbonim
saying anything about this?
LW
Vues Master’s Note: My Rebbe would
say it is more Bar than Mitzvah