01 Nov A MOTHER’S TEARS

 Rochel Imeinu, Mama Rochel, Mother Rachel. No matter the language, Rochel is my mother, she is your mother, she is the mother of Klal Yisroel, the Jewish nation

This Shabbos, the 11th of Cheshvan, is the yahrtzeit of Rochel Imeinu. A time to remember the life she lived, and contemplate the lessons we can learn from her.

In Hebrew, Rochel is spelled reish, ches, lamed. I heard it said in the name of a mekubal, that Rochel’s name reflects the very essence of her being. Reish represents rachamim – compassion, ches signifies chesed – kindness, and lamed denotes lev – heart. Rochel’s life, like her name, was filled with love for her children, for her people.

Esther Senter, in Mishpacha magazine wrote of a taxi ride she took to Kever Rochel. She described the driver as “one of those guys who looked like he just got off the battlefield. The gruff, tough type.” When the taxi pulled up to the site, the driver shifted his car into park, opened the glove compartment, and took out a yarmulke. He proceeded to walk with Mrs. Senter to the Kever. Before they entered, he turned to her, placed his hand over his heart and said, “She is also my Ima”.

Rochel – mother of the entire nation.

What is it that draws us to Rochel, that so many flock to her burial place with their prayers, their pleas, their tears?

We all have so much to daven for, and Kever Rochel is like a soothing balm for the neshamah. Davening at Rochel’s tomb is like having a mother at your side saying “It will all be okay, I am with you”.

Rochel is buried alone, on the roadside in Beis Lechem, yet there is something that pulls us there. A trip to Eretz Yisroel wouldn’t be complete without “visiting” Mama Rochel.

While all four matriarchs are mothers to the Jewish nation, why is it only Rochel who is known universally as Mama, Ima, Mother?

To answer the question, let’s turn to a beautiful Midrash in Megillas Eichah.

The Bais HaMikdash was in ruins, the nation exiled to Babylonia, the hearts of the people were broken.

The Navi Yirmiyahu calls upon the neshamos of our leaders to beg and plead to HaShem on behalf of the nation. Avraham, Yitzchak, Yaakov and Moshe. Each one cried out, each one mentioned their good deeds to serve as a z’chus, a merit for Am Yisroel.

However, it was not their pleas, but the cries and tears of Mama Rochel that pierced the Heavens.

The Midrash (Eichah Rabbah 1:24) tells us “koftzah Rochel” — Rochel jumped up before HaShem, pleading for her children. She spoke of Yaakov’s deep love for her and their waiting many years to marry. She spoke of her father Lavan’s scheme to place her sister Leah in what was meant to be her spot under the chuppah. How she and Yaakov made up signs between them to save them from Lavan’s plan. And then, Rochel spoke of her change of heart. When Rochel thought of the pain that it would cause Leah, her decision was made – she felt compelled to share the secret codes with her sister.

It was with that recollection of her selfless act of kindness that Rochel was able to cry out to HaShem, to implore HaShem to do something about the suffering of the Jewish nation. “If I, who is just a basar v’dam – a person made of flesh and blood, and without any trace of jealousy gave over the signs to my sister, as I couldn’t bear to see her shamed and embarrassed under the chuppah, how can You be jealous of idolatry, in which there is no substance; How can You bear to watch Your beloved children suffer?” 

Rochel mevakah al boneh-ah – Rochel cries for her children.

It was then that the mercy of HaShem was aroused, and He said (Yirmiyahu 31:14-16), “Mini koleich mi-bechi – restrain your voice from crying, v’einayich midimah — your eyes from weeping, ki yesh sochor lifulaseich- for there is reward for your deeds… v’shovu banim ligvulam – and your children will return to their border”.

The Talmud tells us (Berachos 32b); “Shaarei dimah lo ninalu – the gates of tears are never closed”. It is through tears that our redemption will come. The tears of Rochel Imeinu. The tears of so many mothers crying for their children.

I carry the name of my father’s mother, Chaya Sora, hy”d. My father told me that from the time his brother Yosef Dov hy”d was taken by the Germans, before the other family members, his mother never laid down in bed, but sat all night on a chair, crying and davening for her son. My father was a young boy then. It hurt him so to see his mother in pain. “Please Mommy, try to get some rest” he would plead. “How can I rest, if my Yosef Dov isn’t here” his mother responded.

A mother’s tears. A mother’s prayers.

From Rochel we learn to cry for our people, our families, our children. For all who are in pain. To feel from the heart.

A friend shared with me a story about her daughter, a young mother who took her little three-year-old son for a school interview. After speaking to the child, the principal turned to the mother, “Can I ask you what are your thoughts on leil Shabbos during candle-lighting”? Her eyes instantly welled up with tears. Upon seeing her reaction, the principal said, “You’re in”. 

My mother, the Rebbetzin a”h would say “What sweat is to exercise, tears are to the soul”.

We all need yeshuos, salvation. We are all ready for the geulah, the final redemption. It’s time to follow in the path of Mama Rachel. To exercise our neshamos with tefillos accompanied by tears. 

Every Friday night, we sing Aishes Chayil – A Woman of Valor. There is a Midrash which teaches that each verse alludes to different great women of our history. The passage that refers to Rochel is, “She is like a merchant’s ships that bring bread, (provisions) from afar.” Even though Rochel was raised from “afar”, in the house of Lavan, a home far from Torah and mitzvos, she was able to bring lechem, to give life to future generations. Rochel is compared to a ship, traveling from port to port, from generation to generation, giving hope, strength and comfort. To this day, so many of us go to Rochel and find comfort in our own lives. Like a sea captain who is surrounded by the ocean, yet never loses his dream of sighting land, Rochel was a dreamer. She never gave up on her dream of marrying Yaakov, becoming a mother of his children, and seeking peace for all her future generations.