28 Mar TZAV: FINDING THE REAL YOU

One of the more intriguing stages of the seder on Pesach is yahatz – when we split the middle matzah. We take the larger piece and put it in a bag, while the small piece stays on the table. It is customary for the children to steal the bag with the large piece of matzah and then hide it. The bag is then brought to the table at the end of the seder, and we eat that piece of matzah.What is the meaning of this practice?There are two parts to every person: our public persona, and our true, inner selves. The way we appear on the outside tells only part of the story. The way we conduct ourselves in public, with our friends and in the community, is the small part of our beings. The larger portion is our inner selves, the part that people don’t see. This is the way we conduct ourselves in private, when we are alone, when we are home, with just ourselves and our families. The truth of a person is expressed in the way he responds when a random collector asks for charity, when his name is not going to be on a plaque and he is not going to be honored at a dinner. Of course, all charity is precious, but the “larger piece” of one’s essence is the way he gives in private, when he is not seen.The truth of a person is expressed in the way he speaks with his wife in the privacy of their home, not when they walk into a wedding hall together smiling and happy. It is the behavior in the home that is the “larger piece.”At the seder, we break the matzah and hide the larger piece. We show that the more significant part of who we are is the part that is hidden, that can’t be seen by other people. Only the smaller piece of matzah stays on the table, out in the open – to show that the public part of our beings, the part that people see, is only a small part of who we are. The more substantial portion is the one which is hidden from public view, which nobody sees, the way we act in the privacy of our homes. We bring the larger piece to the table towards the end of the seder, because this is what the seder is about – finding our true selves, discovering who we truly are.This is why it is the children who hide the large piece of matzah – because the children know who we really are. They are the ones who know whether we are patient or short-tempered, generous or selfish, sincere in our religious observance or not. People outside the home see only the tip of the iceberg, but our children see the actual iceberg – our true selves. And so they hide the large piece of matzah, because they know who we really are.The current crisis, as difficult and challenging as it is, offers us a unique opportunity to learn about ourselves. The vast majority of us are spending the vast majority of our time inside our homes, with our families. This is a chance to focus our attention on the “large piece of matzah,” and to find out who we really are. Without leaving our homes, we are able to get a good look at our true selves, to know ourselves better, to learn about our essence.Let us use this rare opportunity to find the “real you” – and to make sure that the “larger piece” of our beings is just as good, if not better, than the “smaller piece” that shows outside the home.