17 Dec SPEAK YOUR VUES WITH THE VUES MASTER
AMEN
Dear Vues Master:
I wanted to write about a phenomenon that I have
witnessed for some time. Many people in shul an-
swer with an Amen “chatuf” – a “snatched” Amen
said before the bracha is completed. This often hap-
pens with kaddish, when the community seems to be
so in the “flow” of what is being said that it doesn’t
wait until the baal koreh has finished the sentence
before it rushed in with a resounding “amen.” This is
not allowed. I ask that people try to be more careful
with this mitzvah, as Chazal viewed Amen not just as
a hiddur, but as the completion of the bracha itself.
A concerned reader
Vues Master’s Note: Thanks! This is extremely im-
portant!
DRONES
Dear Vues Master:
RUMOUR HAS IT around DC that a small dirty
nuclear device has been snuck into the US in pieces
across the border and is being assembled in one of
our cities, and in an attempt to find its radiation sig-
nature, drones are being “discreetly” flown all over
the US. THIS IS JUST A RUMOUR AND PROB-
ABLY HAS NO BASIS IN FACT. Are we having
fun yet? LS
Vues Master’s Note: You sound like a speaker that
drones on and on!
SHOMRIM
Dear Vues Master:
I just wanted to give a big public THANK YOU to
Bob Moskowitz & Tzvi Weil and the entire Flatbush
Shomrim for all they do. The world is crazier than
ever. There is more antisemitism on the streets of
Brooklyn than ever before. The people that volunteer
& their families deserve a big Hakaras Hatov. They
work tirelessly for the tzibur & for that I just want to
say Thank YOU!
RT
Vues Master’s Note: And most of all we should thank
Hashem who is up 24-7 watching over us!
DOUGH-NUTS
Dear Vues Master:
How do bakeries charge more than $5 for a donut
over Chanukah? Why does anyone spend that type
of money on a donut? Two or three dollars for a spe-
cialty donut I understand but $10?? Crazy!!
AG
Vues Master’s Note: It is called supply and demand!
As long as there are people ready to pay for them
they will be sold at those prices!
GOOD EYE
Dear Vues Master:
When a police officer pulled over a car speeding at
160 kilometer per hour on the highway from Tel Aviv
to Jerusalem and came face to face with the driver,
he said: “Moshe Dayan! You were flying! You’re
supposed to set a good example. I should give you
multiple tickets.” Dayan responded: “Officer, I have
only one eye. Where do you want me to keep it, on
the road or on the speedometer?”
MK
Vues Master’s Note: He was a One eyed One horned
flying Lukshen kugel eater!
DST
Dear Vues Master:
President-elect Donald Trump announced last Friday
that he and the Republican party intend to push for
the complete abolition of daylight saving time once
he assumes office. How will this affect zman tefil-
lah? PW
Vues Master’s Note: As long as he does not make it
daylight savings time all year long we are good!!
PALESTINIAN
Dear Vues Master:
Can someone name a “Palestinian” (He was Egyp-
tian.) leader, artist, scientist, actor, or really anything
else before Yasser Arafat? Since, ya
know, they’ve been around for thousands
of years, we should have a long list. Can
anyone name one? One Palestinian hu-
man before Arafat? Exactly.
HF
Vues Master’s Note: All the kings of
Plishtim in Tanach!
POPULAR
Dear Vues Master:
The chazzan complained to the Rabbi of
the shul that he was insulted by one of
the congregants, who criticized his dav-
ening. Seeking to comfort him, the Rabbi
assured him that the congregant does not
know what he’s talking about. “He’s just
repeating what the rest of the congrega-
tion says.” BM
Vues Master’s Note: Rumor has it that
the Chazzan won by Electoral Votes!
THREE DREAMS
Dear Vues Master:
According to the Chizkuni and other Ris-
honim, Yosef had 3 dreams.
The Bartenura writes Yosef’s first dream
was about 10 candles not able to extin-
guish the 1 candle. (ב“ע ז“ט מגילה(
The Torah doesn’t mention details of this
dream because it didn’t come true. The
brothers did manage to harm Yosef
MF
Vues Master’s Note: If only dreams can
come true!
FATHER
Dear Vues Master:
In an elementary school math class, the
teacher asked a student: “If I borrowed
$100 from your father and paid him back
$30, how much do I owe him?”
The student answered with a
question of his own: “Did you
get a receipt?” “No,” the teacher
said. “Well, then you owe him
$100.” Shocked, the teacher said:
“You’re going to fail this class.
You don’t know any math.” The
student replied: “I know math.
You don’t know my father.” LM
Vues Master’s Note: What an as-
tute student and son!
ALL I WANT FOR
CHANUKAH IS MY
DADDY
by COUNTRY YOSSI TOIV
Dear HASHEM,
It’s been so long
I hardly can remember
The last time that he
held me in his arms
I hear his voice, his eyes aglow
Sweet lullabies of long ago
Now all I hear’s the sound
of guns and bombs
CHORUS:
All I want for Chanukah is my daddy
Safe and sound and
standing next to me
You can give the toys
To all the other girls and boys
Just bring my loving Daddy
home to me
Sometimes in my dreams
I hear him calling
And I run to him
and hug him very tight
But though I hope and pray
He just slowly fades away
And leaves me crying,
lonely in the night
All I want for Chanukah is my daddy
Safe and sound and
Standing next to me
I promise to be good
And do all the things I should
Just bring my loving daddy
home to me
Chanukah night, I’m about to light
The candles
When suddenly
Mom cries out joyfully
And there to my surprise
I just can’t believe my eyes
It’s my daddy-
HASHEM brought him home to me
All I ever wanted was my daddy
I missed him more than
He would ever know
On this very special night
We both hug each other tight
And all I know is I’m not
Letting go
Vues Master’s Note: What a sad song!
AGED
Dear Vues Master:
While cleaning the attic, Joan and Harry
found an old stub for some shoes they
left at the repair shop 10 years ago. They
thought it would be fun to go to the shop
and see if the shoes were still there. So
they did. They handed the stub to the
repair man who took it and looked in
the back. He came out again and said,
“They’ll be ready on Wednesday.” PO
Vues Master’s Note: Ready or not here
we come!
THE STORY OF RAV CHANAN
& THE TWO MERCHANTS
Dear Vues Master
In a small town in the Galilee, there lived
a highly respected sage named Rav Chan-
an. Known for his wisdom and humility,
people traveled great distances to seek
his guidance on matters of Halacha. Rav
Chanan was not known for being overly
strict or overly lenient. Instead, he was
known for his ability to find solutions that
upheld the Torah while considering the
complexities of each situation. One day,
two merchants came before Rav Chanan,
each with a pressing case. They were em-
broiled in a dispute over a shipment of oil
that had been accidentally delivered to
the wrong address. One of the merchants,
Reuven, claimed he had pur-
chased the oil months ago and
had proof of ownership. The
other, Shimon, argued that
he had unknowingly paid for
the same oil and was now in
possession of it. Both were
observant Jews, and each de-
manded a strict halachic rul-
ing to determine the rightful
owner. Rav Chanan listened
carefully to their arguments.
He studied the documents
they brought and carefully ex-
amined the facts. After some
time, Rav Chanan spoke. “My
dear friends,” he began, “Hal-
acha is not merely about the
letter of the law; it is about the spirit of
the Torah, which is justice tempered by
compassion. In Pirkei Avot (5:10), we are
taught that one who says, ‘What is mine
is mine, and what is yours is yours’—this
is a median trait, but it can also represent
the trait of Sodom. Why? Because strict
adherence to personal rights can lead
to injustice when taken to the extreme.
Our goal is not only to uphold the law
but to reflect the ways of HaShem, who
is both strict in justice and abundant in
mercy.” The merchants were puzzled.
“But Rav,” asked Reuven, “if I have the
proof of purchase, shouldn’t you simply
rule in my favor? Why should there be
any leniency for Shimon?” Rav Chanan
smiled. “You ask a valid question, but
let us consider something deeper. The
Rambam writes in Hilchot Sanhedrin
(24:10) that it is the responsibility of a
judge not only to rule justly but to seek
peaceful resolutions wherever possible,
avoiding enmity between disputants. In
this case, if I rule strictly for you, Re-
uven, Shimon will leave here feeling
cheated and angry, for he acted without
malice and thought the oil was rightfully
his. If I rule for Shimon, you, too, will
feel that your rights have been ignored.
What does strict justice achieve in such a
case?” Both merchants fell silent as they
considered his words. Rav Chanan con-
tinued, “In the Yerushalmi Taanit (4:2),
our sages teach: ‘A judge who renders
a strict ruling and causes unnecessary
harm, even if his ruling is correct, is ac-
countable to Heaven.’ A great sage does
not merely seek to rule; he seeks to bring
harmony. In this, he emulates HaShem,
whose ways are ‘pleasantness, and all
her paths are peace’ (Mishlei 3:17).” The
merchants nodded, but Shimon hesitated.
“But Rav,” he asked, “doesn’t leniency
sometimes risk undermining the Torah
itself? Shouldn’t we uphold the strict
boundaries of Halacha to preserve its
integrity?” Rav Chanan’s face grew se-
rious. “It is true that leniency, when ap-
plied carelessly, can lead to disrespect
for Halacha. But the mark of a truly wise
sage is not simply to make rulings based
on what is forbidden or permitted in
black and white terms. A wise sage must
know how to apply the Torah’s principles
to complex realities. Our sages taught,
‘The power of leniency is greater than
the power of stringency’ (Beit-
zah 2b). Why? Because leniency
requires greater understanding of
the law, a deeper comprehension
of its spirit, and a willingness to
bear responsibility for interpret-
ing its complexities.” Then Rav
Chanan proposed a solution: Re-
uven would be paid for his oil
by Shimon, but in turn, Shimon
would allow Reuven to take first
rights on future shipments of oil.
This arrangement, Rav Chanan
explained, ensured that neither
party suffered significant loss,
and both would leave the court
satisfied that justice and peace
had been achieved. The mer-
chants left Rav Chanan’s home
reconciled, each grateful for the
wisdom of a sage who sought to
unify rather than divide.
THE LESSON
Rav Chanan demonstrated that
Halacha is not a tool for pow-
er or ego, but a means to align
ourselves with HaShem’s will. True
leadership is not about showing one’s
authority through stringency but about
understanding the complexities of each
situation and finding solutions that
honor the Torah’s spirit of compassion
and justice. When we are overly strict
without understanding, we risk creating
resentment and disunity. But when we
use Halacha to navigate the grey areas
with wisdom and humility, we fulfill the
Torah’s deeper purpose. This is why a
great leader is often one who can find
the leniency that preserves both justice
and peace. May we all strive to emulate
the balance and wisdom of Rav Chanan,
upholding the Torah with humility, com-
passion, and understanding.
DEY
Vues Master’s Note: Great lesson.
Thanks for sharing!
CRAZY EDDIE
Dear Vues Master:
Men sitting at a meal were discuss-
ing business, when one of them men-
tioned a colleague who was severely
depressed and wasn’t acting rationally.
“Is he at least paying his debts?” asked
one of the men. “No,” responded anoth-
er. “He’s not that insane!”
MJ
Vues Master’s Note: Debts to society!
WIFE WANTED
Dear Vues Master:
The Personals column in the newspaper
ran an ad saying “Wife wanted.” 1,200
people responded “Take mine.”
HJ
Vues Master’s Note: I wonder what
would happen to an ad called Husband
wanted!