21 Jan PARASHAT VAERA: A PARENTS JOB

Parashat Vaera begins in
the middle of a difficult
exchange between
Hashem and Moshe
Rabbenu. To briefly
review, Hashem had
sent Moshe to come
before Pharaoh and demand that he release
Beneh Yisrael. Moshe did as he was told, and
Pharaoh not only refused, but increased the
people’s workload, significantly intensifying
their suffering.
Moshe then turned to Hashem and asked,
“Why have You done evil to Your people?
Why did you send me?”
Hashem reassured Moshe that He would force
Pharaoh to let Beneh Yisrael go.
In the beginning of Parashat Vaera, Hashem
continues His response to Moshe, telling him,
“I am Hashem; and I appeared to Avraham,
Yitzhak and Yaakov with [the Name] ‘Kel
Sha-ddai’.” The commentators explain this
to mean that Hashem made promises to the
Avot, but did not show them the fulfillment
of these promises. He promised to produce
from them a large nation that would inhabit
the Land of Israel, but they never lived to see
these promises realized. Nevertheless, they
did not complain or protest, as Moshe did

when G-d’s promise to free Beneh Yisrael was
not immediately fulfilled.
It goes without saying that Moshe had perfect
faith in Hashem. At no point did he doubt
that Hashem would fulfill His promise to
free Beneh Yisrael. Rather, as Seforno (5:22)
explains, Moshe was asking why he was
part of this. “Why did you send me?” He of
course realized that Hashem had his reasons
for making Beneh Yisrael’s conditions worse.
But he felt like a failure. He did what Hashem
sent him to do, and he failed. His efforts had
the precise opposite effect of what he was
supposed to achieve. This is what troubled
him – that his work and efforts were futile.
Hashem responded by pointing to the example
of Avraham, Yitzhak and Yaakov. They never
felt like failures, even though they never saw
the realization of their mission. Each time they
heard Hashem’s promise of a great nation,
they encountered hardships. Avraham had no
children, and had to leave the land because
of a famine. Yitzhak had to struggle with the
Pelishtim who chased him away and then stole
his wells. Yaakov received Hashem’s promise,
and then had to deal with Lavan and Esav.
Later, his daughter was abducted, and his sons
sold their brother as a slave. But the Avot did
not feel like failures. They recognized their
greatness and importance, and the great value

of their efforts, and trusted that Hashem will
eventually fulfill His promises.
As mentioned, Parashat Vaera begins with
Hashem telling Moshe, “I appeared to
Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov…” Rashi
makes a very unusual remark on this verse.
Commenting on the word “Vaera” (“I
appeared”), Rashi writes, “El Ha’avot” – “to
the patriarchs.” For some reason, Rashi found
it necessary to clarify that Avraham, Yitzhak
and Yaakov were the “Avot,” our nation’s
founding fathers. Aren’t we already well
aware of this? Do we not already know who
Avraham, Yitzhak and Yaakov were?
The answer might be that Rashi here is
teaching us what a parent’s role is, what
makes someone into an “Av,” a father or
mother. A parent’s primary job is to model
for his or her children this quality mentioned
here in this pasuk – the quality of resilience in
times of failure and disappointment. Avraham,
Yitzhak and Yaakov are our “fathers” because
they showed us how to remain confident,
strong and determined even when things do
not work out, even when the chips are down,
even when our efforts do not succeed. They
continued believing in Hashem, and – no less
importantly – believing in themselves, even in
times of crisis and hardship. At no point did
they see themselves as failures, as hopeless,

or as unimportant, even when their efforts did
not yield the results they wanted. And this is
what makes them our “fathers.”

Our generation suffers from a lack of self-
confidence and self-esteem. Youngsters today

see other people’s success and achievements
and feel unimportant and insignificant, like
failures. The most critical job that parents
have, especially in our generation, is to instill
within their children a keen sense of their
importance and worth, to assure them of
their potential for greatness, to make them
realize how much they can accomplish, and
how much they matter. Children should
never see themselves as failures, regardless
of their grades, social standing, or any other
factor. They need to know that they have
the potential for greatness, that they have so
much to contribute to the world, even if they
have met with disappointment and failure. If
we can do this, then we are doing our job as
parents, following the example of our saintly
Avot.