08 Oct A TALE OF TWO BANK MANAGERS: THE ESSENCE OF YOM KIPPUR IF I’M NEVER ENOUGH, I GIVE UP

Forgiveness
Should Not Create
Fear
During the ten days
from Rosh Hashanah
through Yom Kippur,
known as the “Ten days
of Teshuvah,” we recite each morning one of
the most beautiful and moving chapters of
Tehillim, ch. 130. It contains a most
enigmatic verse, which is repeated many
times during the prayers of Selichot, Rosh
Hashanah and Yom Kippur.
“But you offer forgiveness, so that we might
learn to fear you.”
The logic is counterintuitive. People who
offer forgiveness are less feared, not more
feared. If I know that you are the “forgiving
type,” I fear you less, not more. What then
does Dovid HaMelech mean “But you offer
forgiveness, so that we might learn to fear
you?”
A Tale of Two Bank Managers
Rabbi Schnuer Zalman of Liadi (1745-
1812), known as the Alter Rebbe, the Baal
HaTanya, explained it with a metaphor from
the world of economics. The entire metaphor

is his; the specific example is mine.
It is 2006. The real estate market is booming.
You took a 100 million dollar loan from the
bank to renovate a massive complex in
Manhattan which you will sell and earn a
profit of 50 million. Not bad for a nice Jewish
boy who is ADD and a college dropout.
Suddenly, the market collapses, you can’t sell
your condos, and you are left with a major
debt. You meet with the bank manager. He
declares: We want the entire debt paid up—
the 100 million with all the interest, as per the
schedule we agreed upon. On the 15th your
first payment of 1.5 million is due.
You go home, and you know in your mind,
there is no way you can do this. Even if you
were to stand on your head for a month, you
simply cannot come up with this money. So
what do you do? Mentally, you give up. You
ignore the monthly invoices, notices,
summons, and warnings. You get your house
off your name, you push off the hearings till
2033, and you go for a good massage. You
tell your wife, the guy is crazy, and you don’t
even think of it anymore. There is nothing
better you can do.
But suppose another scenario: The bank
manager says, okay, we all got hit badly. We

are all in a big mess. We all need to bite
the bullet. You were wiped out; we
were also wiped out. Let’s work this
out fairly and lovingly. How about, we
cut the loan by 30 percent? We remove
all interest. Let’s make this work for
both of us. I need you to work with me.
What would be a feasible schedule of
payment?
Ah, now you get scared… Now you
need to go home and you need to figure
it out. Now you need to come up with some
money. He is being such a mentch, you can’t
betray him. You need to show up with
payment.
This, says the Alter Rebbe, is the meaning
of the verse, “But you offer forgiveness, so
that we might learn to fear you.” If G-d
demanded full compensation for all our
mistakes, if He demanded that we pay up in
full, with interest, then we would not fear
Him; we would give up on Him.
It is like the child who can never please their
parent. Whatever he does, it is never enough,
and every mistake is highlighted. At some
point, such children give up completely. “If I
have no hope of ever getting it right, why try?
If I will always be criticized, why bother?”

The child, in a mixture of cynicism, rebellion,
pain, and despair, just severs the relationship.
“But you offer forgiveness, so that we might
learn to fear you,” Dovid HaMelech says.
G-d forgives. He never asks us to be perfect,
only to be accountable. He asks of us to meet
Him halfway. He tells each of us on Yom
Kippur: I want to make this work for YOU. I
want you to live the most meaningful,
beautiful, successful, powerful and happy
life you can. I yearn for you to help Me make
your life the ultimate success story.
Now we really have to go into our hearts
and mend our mistakes, fix our wrongs and
resolve to live a purer and holier future.
“But you offer forgiveness, so that we might
learn to fear you.”