01 Jun BEHAALOTECHA: TRUE STRENGTH: LETTING IT GO

The final pesukim of
Parashat Behaalotecha
tell the famous story of
Miriam speaking
inappropriately about
her brother, Moshe
Rabbenu. Miriam was punished
with tzara’at for speaking lashon ha’ra about
her brother.
One of the most significant aspects of this
story is what’s missing – Moshe’s reaction to
Miriam’s harsh words. We don’t find Moshe
saying anything to Miriam. In fact, the Torah
interjects, “that Moshe was the humblest
man in the world (12:3).” This implies that
Moshe, in his great humility, kept silent.
The Gemara (Gittin 36b) speaks about the
unique greatness of those who do not respond
to insults, who simply remain quiet when
others put them down. Such people, the
Gemara teaches, are the ones of whom
the pasuk in the Book of Shoftim (5:31)
says, “…and those who love Him are like the
sun when it comes out in all its force.”
In other words, people who keep quiet, who
do not respond when they are offended or
insulted, who simply ignore it and go about

their day, have special power.
Indeed, numerous stories are told of people
whose prayers were answered in this merit –
because they would keep quiet and not
respond to insults. For example, the Gemara
in Masechet Ta’anit (25b) tells that once,
during a harsh drought, the people assembled
to pray, and after Rabbi Akiva led the prayer
service, rain began to fall. Specifically,
Rabbi Akiva’s prayers were answered, the
Gemara explains, because he excelled in the
quality of Ma’avir Al Midotav – letting
things go, not responding to insults.
What is so special about this quality? Why is
it so difficult to remain quiet and not
respond?
One answer, perhaps, is that this is something
we cannot prepare for ahead of time. We
never know when somebody will offend us,
hurt our feelings, or disrespect us.
Just as an example – I recall once when I was
delivering a speech, somebody walked into
the room in the middle and announced that I
had already exceeded my allotted time, and I
needed to stop. I was a little taken aback, and
I politely asked if I could have just another

two minutes as I was right in the middle of a
thought. He adamantly refused, insisting that
I stop my speech dead in its tracks.
As I walked out of the room, I passed by that
person. I am proud to say that I controlled
the urge I felt to say something to him, but I
cannot say I was unaffected. I was upset,
angry and agitated.
There is no way to prepare for experiences
like these. They just happen. We can mentally
prepare ourselves for challenges that we
anticipate, such as waking up in time for
prayers in the morning, closing the business
before Shabbat, dressing the way we are
supposed to dress, or refraining from going
somewhere we know we should not go. But
we cannot prepare ourselves to be Ma’avir
Al Midotav, to remain quiet, to not respond
to something hurtful that somebody says or
does.
The only solution is to be humble like Moshe
Rabbenu, to develop and strengthen our
characters to the point where people’s
opinions of us don’t matter. And if we can do
this – then we become incredibly
powerful. Nobody is stronger than the person
who is not discouraged by insults, who is

unaffected by what people say or think about
him.
Let us harness this remarkable power through
the quality of Ma’avir Al Midotav, by
following Moshe Rabbenu’s example of
genuine humility, by making ourselves
invulnerable to insults.