29 Apr DATING AND RELATIONSHIP ADVICE

Dear Rabbi and Shira
Hi, I read your column every week. It prompts much conversation over the Shabbos table. I’m a regular Flatbush/Midwood guy who is into
the Sifrei Chassidus. It started when I was a teenager. I’m a fan of Rav Moshe Weinberger’s shiurim, and the Story of Your Life by Rabbi Klein.
I find it adds so much meaning to everything I’m doing whether I’m going to work, when learning Gemara, or davening. Here’s my problem.
I’ve been set up with some wonderful girls, who went to great seminaries, but they don’t understand what I’m talking about, what excites me in
Yiddishkeit. I tell them I love chassidus, and they think I want someone who wears seamed stockings or only speaks in yiddish. I don’t want to
move to Williamsburg, I simply want the Ribono Shel Olam to be part of my family. What should I do? -Spiritual on Avenue S

Chassidus excites you and
means so much to you! It’s great
to be having this conversation.
I remember Rav Weinberger
telling a story about Reb
Shmuel, a older Polisher Jew
who learned in an afternoon
Kollel with him for teachers in
Queens. He would learn Meor
Einaim the last half hour of
seder on Thursday afternoon.
His satisfaction was audible, as he would exclaim
“Oh! Ah’!” expressing his joy and excitement over his
learning throughout the half hour. One week, one of the

Yeshivishe Rebbeim there gave him a copy
of Lev Eliyahu by Rav Elya Lopian. Within
five minutes, the same chorus of “Ohs! And
Ahs!” filled the room. Reb Shmuel declared
“This Reb Elya, couldn’t have been a Litvak,
he must have been an undercover Chasidic
spy!” It doesn’t matter the “brand” of
spirituality, what matters is the heart.
So long as your Kallah knows that
Chassidus is something special to you,
and gives your Yiddishkeit energy, we
don’t think it should be a problem at all. As long as
she’s not a forceful opponent to chassidus, and most
importantly,she is a Chasida of the Ribono shel Olam,

it can work out. Many of the women who attended
seminary will have a common vocabulary to that of
Chassidus, even if they don’t know all the lingo, there’s
still an emphasis on avodas Hashem and a relationship
with Hashem in a lot of women’s seminaries.
Especially if learning Chassidus makes you a more
present spouse and father, it will make a kiddush
Hashem all around.
We hope you find a special Kallah, with whom you will
make a home, with Hashem filling it.
Rabbi Reuven and Shira Boshnack.