09 Apr DAVENING FOR A PURE MOUTH

After saying the Yi’h’yu
l’ratzon following Sim
Shalom, some people
have the minhag to say
the kapital of tehillim
“Shir lama’alos, esa
einai el haharim,” before
commencing Elokai n’tzor. This is based
on the opinion of the Asora Ma’amoros
written by the Ramah M’Pano, zt”l, zy”a,
who said the saying of it is a special segulah
for getting married. This is because it says
“Mei’ayin yavo ezri – From where will my
help come? Ezri mei’im Hashem – The
help will come from Hashem,” and the
word eizer specifically refers to one’s mate,
as in the verse, “E’esah lo eizer k’negdo – I
will make (for man) a helper to face him.”
Similarly, Rebbetzin Kanievsky, zt”l, zy”a
related that it was the custom of her father,
the great Rav Elyashiv, zt”l, zy”a, to say
this kapital before the end of Shemone Esrei
and he said it was the custom of his holy
father, the Leshem, zt”l, zy”a. Rebbetzin
Kanievsky also related that she heard from
a son in-law that there were about 20 older
bochrim in the yeshiva of Chevron who had
not yet found their partners. They heard
about this segulah and within two months
all 20 got engaged. It should be noted that

this chapter requesting eizer, help, can be
applied to all sorts of needs such as a cure
from sickness.
I remember that I used to say this kapital
of tehillim with my late beloved Rebbetzin,
Miriam Libby, zt”l, zy”a, during her
chemotherapy. She had suffered, lo aleinu,
from the dreaded disease pancreatic cancer
which at that time had no known cure.
When we said, “Ezri mei’im Hashem,
oseh shamayim v’aretz – Help is from
Hashem, the Maker of heaven and earth.”
I explained to her the linkage as follows.
Just like Hashem created heaven and earth,
yeish mei’ayin, ex nihilo, something from
nothing, He could certainly heal a person
even if there is no known cure.
The Shaar HaKavanos writes that at this
juncture in Shemone Esrei, during a time
of plague (such as covid), it is proper to
say the chapter in tehillim, Lam’natzei’ach
b’neginos mizmor shir.
The last part of Shemone Esrei is the
prayer of Elokai n’tzor. In the Gemora in
Berachos [17b], it records twelve different
personal prayers of saintly tzadikim. One
of the twelve is Elokai n’tzor, the prayer
of Mar, the son of Ravina. It became
universally accepted by Klal Yisroel. The

Imrei Shefer writes that it was the custom
of the Chasam Sofer, zt”l, zy”a, to say all
twelve of the aforementioned personal
prayers every day.
Since it was constructed as a personal
prayer, we say it in the lashon yachid, as
a singular request. This is unlike the rest
of the Shemone Esrei which we say in
the lashon rabim, the plural. Indeed the
Gaon, in the Shnos Eliyahu Berachos [5:1],
writes that this prayer is a time for personal
requests.
We begin the prayer, “Elokai n’tzor
l’shoni mei’ra – My G-d, protect my tongue
from evil.” It is amazing to note that the
only mitzvah we ask Hashem directly to
help us with, is when it comes to lashon
hara, evil gossip. Even though the laws of
Shabbos are so numerous and complex that
the Mishnah Berurah, in the preface of his
third volume, writes that one who does not
know the laws of Shabbos cannot possibly
be a complete shomer Shabbos. Yet, we
don’t ask Hashem for assistance in keeping
Shabbos. Nor do we ask His help when it
comes to the complexities of family purity,
or keeping kosher.
I believe the reason why we zoom in
on the transgressions of the tongue is
because it is the most ruinous of sins.
As the Gemora says in the beginning of
Yerushalmi Peah, the three worst sins are
idolatry, immorality, and bloodshed, and
lashon hara is k’neged kulom, equal to
them all. As the posuk attests, “Hamaves
v’hachaim b’yad halashon – Death
and life are in the hand of the tongue.
Furthermore, the Shelah HaKadoosh,
zt”l, zy”a, cites the Gemora in Bava Basra
[154b], “V’kulom b’avak lashon hara –
And everyone is guilty of the ‘dust’ of
lashon hara.” Therefore, we all need to
petition for assistance in avoiding it.
One might wonder, ‘How can we ask
Hashem that we shouldn’t sin?’ After
all, it says, “Hakol bidei shamayim chutz
miyiras shamayim – Everything is in the
hands of Heaven except the fear of G-d?”
Isn’t the choice to avoid sin up to us? The
Eitz Yosef cites the Avudraham who says
that it is proper to ask Hashem’s assistance
in avoiding sin. The Chareidim insists
that one is required to pray to Hashem
to save oneself from the wiles of the
yeitzer hara, the evil inclination. As the
Gemora says in Kiddushin [81b], the holy
Amaraim would pray, “Rachmana litzlan,
meiYeiter Hara – May the merciful one
save us from the evil inclination.” Indeed
the holy Shelah interprets “Elokai, n’tzor
l’shoni meira – My G-d, gauard my
tongue from evil,” to also mean from the

evil inclination who is called Evil, as in the
verse, “Yeitzer leiv ha’adom rah m’ne’urav
– The inclination of the heart of man is Evil
(ra) from his youth.”
The Chofetz Chaim, in Shmiras Haloshon
[Section 2:1] explains that since further
on in this prayer we will ask that Hashem
to open our hearts in Torah, we preface it
now with the request to not sin with lashon
hara because the mouth that sullies itself
with lashon hara, its Torah is not worth
anything!! The Olas Tomid also cites the
Chofetz Chaim who insists that this prayer
for assistance in guarding our tongues is
only effective if we combine it with our
actual efforts to guard our tongue. Lip
service alone is meaningless chatter.
Finally, the Seder Hayom adds another
angle to this request. After finishing our
prayers and perhaps realizing that they
were not up to snuff and maybe we even
said Hashem’s Name without proper
attention (It is for this reason that some
people elevate their voice slightly when
they say Hashem’s name!), we ask that
in the future, Hashem, guard our tongue
from such evil and help us pray with more
sincere devotion.
In the merit of wanting a refined mouth,
may Hashem bless us with long life, good
health, and everything wonderful.