20 Feb HAPPY BIRTHDAY

The Jewish people have
al-ways focused on
birthdays. On Pesach,
we celebrate the birth
of the Jewish nation.
We say in Mussaf that
the world was created
on Rosh H-shana.
Many question whether
making a birthday party
is a Jewish custom.
In-deed, there are customs for the day of a
birthday which are not well known. In this
issue we will discuss these issues and many
others.
Early Sources on non-Jewish Birthdays
The only birthday party which is recorded in
the Torah is that of Pharaoh. The posuk says,
“It was on the third day, Pha-raoh’s birthday,
that he made a party for all his servants…”
Based on this, some poskim maintain that the
custom to have a birthday party is in fact an

issue of “fol-lowing in the ways of the non-
Jews” and is not the practice of Jews. The

Yerush-almi says that when Amalek attacked
klal yisroel, they used warriors whose birthday
was the same day.

The Mishnah in Avodah Zarah says that non-
Jews would celebrate the birthdays of their

kings.
This has ramifications regarding Jewish
people making birthday parties.
Early Sources Regarding Birthdays The
posuk in Hoshea says, “The day our king….”
The Metzudas Dovid says that the custom of
Jewish kings was to make a simcha and Yom
Tov on their birthdays.
The Gemorah says that when Rav Yo-sef
reached sixty years old he made a party since
he had avoided kares. The posuk in Tehillim
says that the life expectancy of a person is
seventy years and if he is stronger it is eighty
years. Therefore, some celebrated their 70th
birthday.
Others did not necessarily like the day they
were born, as was expressed in Yirmiyahu,
“Cursed should be the day I was born.”
In Koheles it says, “The day of death (is
better) than the day of birth.” However, the
Medrash Sechel Tov says, “Most people are
happy and make a seuda on the day they were
born.”
Growing at Certain Stages The Mishnah lists
the following regard-ing stages of growth:
A five year old begins learning Chumash: a
ten year-old begins Mishnah: a thirteen year
old begins mitzvos; a fifteen year old begins
studying Gemorah; an eighteen year old gets
married; a twenty year old begins running after
(parnasa); a thirty year old attains full strength;
a forty year old receives understanding; a fifty
year old can give advise; a sixty year old is
considered old; a seventy year old attains ripe
old age; an eighty year old shows strength;
a ninety year old become hunch-back; a
hundred year old is considered as if he is not

alive and has gone from the world.
Relevance of a Birth Date Among Early
Jewish Luminaries
We find early sources regarding the benefits
of the day one was born. Yitzchok was born
on the fifteenth day of Nissan, and that is the
day we left Mitzrayim. Moshe Rabbeinu was
born in Adar, and this protected us during the
miracle of Purim. On Shavuos we focus on the
birthday of Dovid Hamel-ech. On Lag B’omer
we celebrate the birth of Rabbi Shimon Bar
Yochai(all of the above three individuals died
on the day they were born). Moshiach was
born on Tisha B’av.
Mazal
The Gemorah says that the mazal of the day
and hour he is born has an impact on his
mazal. We know that “ein mazal l’yisroel,”
which means that the Jewish people have the
ability to overcome any ill effects that a mazal
may have.
We wish a person mazal tov when he reaches
a milestone in his life, such as a bris milah, bar
or bas mitzvah, or an engagement telling them
there mazal should continue to be good.
Those In Favor of Birthday Parties

Throughout the ages, birthdays were cel-
ebrated by Jewish people, even Gedolim.

Their views will now be detailed below:
Some seforim say that the Tiferes Yis-roel
instructed in his will that his chil-dren should
write letters to each other on their birthdays.
The Leket Yosher records that the Teru-mas
Hadeshen made a siyum on the day he turned
sixty years old.
The Ben Ish Chai says, “Some have the
custom to make every year on their birthday
a Yom Tov and it is a good simon, and we
do so in our house.” In addition, he says that
when one reaches sixty or seventy it is proper
to wear a new garment or eat a new fruit and
make a shehechiyanu and have in mind his
age as well (see below). The Ben Yehoyada
says that one should make his birthday like a
Yom Tov.
The Ba’al Shem Tov zt”l was known for
making a seuda on the eighteenth day of
Elul which was the day he was born. Many
Chassidim make as seuda on this day as well
to commemorate his birth. The author of the
Sdei Chemed made a birthday party when he
reached sev-enty years old.
The Chasam Sofer says that Avraham Ovinu
made a party each year on the day that he
had a bris milah. The Ben Ish Chai says the
custom in his house was not to make a party
on the day that his bris was performed.
It is stated in the Ginzei Yosef that “an-shei
ma’ase” recite a shehechiyanu on a new fruit
or garment each year when they reach their
birthday (which brings them joy, see below).
It is definitely proper to give thanks to Hashem
on the day of your birthday.
The Kesav Sofer made a siyum every year
on his birthday, and when he turned fifty he
made a shehechiyanu and made a siyum on

Meseches Pesachim. When the Chofetz Chaim
zt”l reached the age of ninety he finished the
kuntres “Bais Yisroel” and invited some close
friends and made a seuda.
The opinion of Harav Ovadia Yosef zt”; is
that a birthday party made with divrei Torah
and shevach to Hashem would turn the party
into a seudas mitzvah. There were many
Chassidishe Rebbes who celebrated their
birthdays as well.
Those Opposing Birthdays
Although many opinions maintain that there
is nothing wrong with celebrating a birthday,
there are some who take issue with this. These
opinions will be brought below.
The Gemorah says that it is preferable not to
be born. This would support the argument that
celebrating a birthday is not advisable, since it
is not a good thing that one was born.
Based on this, the Divrei Torah main-tains that
we have no tradition of our holy Rabbis or
fathers to make a birth-day party.
In addition, some bring a proof from the fact
that Pharaoh made a birthday party that it is a
non-Jewish custom. Indeed, the Gemorah says
that one of the holi-days of a non-Jew is their
birthday. Some poskim note that there is no
men-tion in the Gemorah, Geonim, Rishonim
or Achronim about a party on the day one
was born. The only mention regards Pharaoh.
The friends of Harav Spector zt”l wished to
make him a 50th anniver-sary of his job in
Rabbonus, but he de-clined. The Otzer Kol
Minhagei Yeshu-run says that people make
these parties because they want to be like their
neigh-bors, but what is the purpose of the joy?
What is the Joy of a Birthday?
A birthday is a good time to give thanks to
those who have contributed to your very
existence, Hashem and your parents. Birth is
a great miracle. Just as we recite a beracha
when we experience a miracle, we should give
thanks for being born.
We rejoice over a birth and mourn a death.
Logically, the opposite should be true, since
a newborn faces uncertainty, while a dead
person has fulfilled his mission. Regarding
this, Koheles says, “The day of death (is
better) than the day of birth.” However, each
Jew-ish person has a chazaka that he will
do well (chezkas kashrus) therefore, we are
happy when a person is born. This is the joy
of a birthday as well, as we celebrate the
opportunity to fulfill mitzvos and improve
ourselves each year.
Shehechiyanu When Turning Seventy
Some poskim are of the opinion that when
one reaches seventy he should make a
shehechiynau, while others dis-agree. One
should make the beracha without the shem or
malchus.
Practices on a Birthday
On one’s birthday, it is proper to:
Give thanks to Hashem.
Give berochos to Others.

Give extra money to tzedaka.
Make a siyum.
Receive an aliyah to the Torah.
Set aside extra time to learn Torah. Daven for
the amud.
Go to a tzaddik and receive a beracha
(common in many Chassidishe circles).
Engage in introspection and seek ways to
improve himself.
Visit the Kosel Hama’aravi.
Which Tefillos to say on Specific
Birthdays
From age seventy and on one should say
Tehillim chapter 103 on every birthday.
“Live Until 120”
A common beracha we give to people is that
they should live until 120 years old. Moshe
Rabbeinu lived to 120.
Blowing out Candles on a Cake
The practice of putting candles on a birthday
cake corresponding to the cel-ebrant’s age
does not stem from a Jewish custom and should
not be done. Candles in the Jewish religion
represent the soul. When extinguishing the
candles, one should not blow it out with his
mouth. The poskim say it is a danger to do
so, especially since this custom stems from
the non-Jews. The custom seems to be lenient
with this, but one should avoid it if possible.
Conclusion
Although some poskim say that mak-ing a
birthday party is not a Jewish practice, the
custom is nevertheless to make birthday
parties. However, these parties should not be
turned into jokes and levity.