01 Nov LECH LECHA: ACCEPT THE STORY THAT IS BEING WRITTEN

The story is told of a Rabbi who once came to Rav Yosef Haim Sonenfeld to discuss a certain halachic topic. The Rabbi presented his opinion, and Rav Sonenfed told him that his reasoning was incorrect. But the Rabbi did not relent, and he repeated his argument. Once again, Rav Sonenfeld dismissed what he said as incorrect. Finally, after the Rabbi tried several times to argue his position, Rav Sonenfeld said, “It seems to me that this is something which you’ve written down. This is why you refuse to accept that it’s wrong.”

This story is, I believe, exceedingly important, and very relevant to all of us.

Why†do†we†get†so†flustered†when†things†don’t work out the way we expect them to? Why do we get upset when our children don’t act the way we want them to? When people in the community don’t act the way we want them†toø†When†things†in†the†office†don’t†work out the way we want them to? Or when the “wrong” candidate – meaning, the one we didn’t vote for – gets elected?

The reason is because we already “wrote it down.”

In our minds, we have a script of how things should be. We have a script of what our marriage should be like, what our children should be like, what our job or business should be like, what the community should be like, and what our country should be like. And so when something happens that’s not in the script – which, of course, happens all the time – we get rattled. We get frustrated. Like the Rabbi in the story, we insist that this is not the way it’s supposed to be, and it upsets us that this is what’s happening.

The†first†instruction†that†Hashem†gave†to†Avraham Avinu was ≠†לך†לך†≠†מארצך†וממולדתך

ומבית†אביך†– “Go forth from your land, from

your birthplace, and from your father’s homeÆ”†This†is†the†first†command†given†to†Avraham, because this is what being a Jew is all about – going, leaving, moving forward, progressing, advancing, achieving. Being a Jew means that we don’t just stay comfortably where we are, but rather constantly work and strive to grow and achieve more.

Significantly¨†Hashem†did†not†at†first†tell†Avraham where he was going. He told him to go אל†הארץ†אשר†אראך†– “to the land which I

will show you.” Growing requires us to accept whatever is “shown” to us, to go wherever we are led, even if it’s not “in the script,” not where we had planned to go. We grow when unforeseen and undesirable circumstances force us to be creative, to be bold, to be persistent, to work hard to come up with solutions.

This

is the command of לך†לך†. If things al

ways went smoothly, precisely according to the script in our minds, then we do not “go forth,” we would not produce and achieve.

This idea really struck me when I was learning the halachot relevant to a Jewish cemetery, and I encountered a discussion among the poskim as to whether a Sefer Torah may be brought to a cemetery under certain circumstances. One of the famous poskim, the Noda Bi’yehuda, wrote that one factor to consider for allowing this is the fact that many Torah scrolls have mistakes, or chipped letters, and are thus invalid. Since the Sefer Torah in any event might not actually be a proper Sefer Torah, there is greater room to allow bringing it to a cemetery.

It occurred to me when I learned this piece by the Noda Bi’yehuda just how much better religious life is today, in so many ways, than it used to be. True, our generation has its unique religious challenges, and it’s true that we do not have towering sages like the Gaon of Vilna or the Hafetz Haim. But, we don’t have to worry about our Sifreh Torah; we have advanced technology to ensure that they are valid. No generation before ever had such high≠quality†tefillin†as†we†haveƆIn†no†other†generation was it possible for every Jew to have his own set of high-quality ארבע†מינים†as

it is in our generation. No other generation had as many fulltime kollel students as our generation has. No other generation made it possible for so many laymen to devote time for Torah learning like our generation.

Imagine if everything had just stayed the same since the time of the Noda Bi’yehuda. Imagine if there weren’t new developments, upheavals, seismic changes that took place. We would never have progressed this far. Nothing would have improved. All these incredible advances in religious life would never have been made.

We need to let go of the script that’s in our head and accept the story that is being written. Unexpected changes and challenges are Hashem’s call of לך†לך†, opportunities to grow

and achieve. Instead of getting rattled, let us remain†confident†and†poised¨†ready†and†eager†to rise to every challenge that Hashem sends our way.