Parashat Miketz tells the miraculous story of Yosef’s rise to power in Egypt. After having been falsely accused of assaulting his master’s wife, and sitting in jail

did was an act of desperation.
שר There was no reason to believe that the

was שר המשקים could help him. The המשקים just one of many, many royal servants, and he had been imprisoned for committing a crime. He was not a man of influence. There was little to no chance of him helping Yosef. Indeed, it took a great miracle – Pha- raoh’s strange dreams and his strong need for an interpretation – for the שר המשקים to help Yosef. But Yosef asked him because he was desperate, and when people are desper- ate, they act irrationally. For a man on Yo- sef’s level of faith in Hashem, this was con- sidered a sin.

This mistake made by Yosef sheds light on what might be his greatest quality – and one which we should all learn from.

Throughout Yosef’s life, no matter what situation he found himself in, he remained composed. He acted with reason and with discipline, without losing control. This is true when he was a slave, when he was in prison, and when he was the vizier and his brothers came to buy grain. The commenta- tors explain that Yosef knew he could not right away reveal his identity to them, be- cause he suspected they still hated him and wanted to hurt him. Instead, he devised an intricate plan to have them gradually realize that they had made a mistake by selling him

as a slave. He controlled his emotions throughout this painful process, retaining his composure at every step of the way. His only mistake was asking the שר המשקים for help.

How did Yosef develop this quality? What was the source of his extraordinary ability to remain calm and composed?

The Midrash teaches that when Yosef was tempted by Potifar’s wife, he told her that he could not commit this sinful act because his grandfather, Yitzhak Avinu, was chosen by G-d as a sacrifice, and so he, too, might be chosen as a sacrifice. If he committed this grave sin, he would be invalid as a sacrifice. According to another opinion in the Mid- rash, Yosef said that G-d might choose to communicate with Him via prophecy, and he would be unable to receive prophecy if he committed this act.

When we dream big, we have more disci- pline and self-control. If we have lofty am- bitions, we have more at stake, and so we retain our composure.

I’ve seen this many times with regard to finances. Ironically, wealthy people are sometimes more fiscally disciplined than people in debt. When a person already has a $10,000 debt on his credit card which he cannot pay, he’ll be more reckless, figuring that another few hundred dollars of debt

for twelve years, he suddenly became the second-in-command in Egypt, as a result of his being brought from prison to interpret Pharaoh’s unusual dreams.

The Midrash comments that Yosef was ac- tually supposed to be released from prison two years earlier, when the שר המשקים (cup- bearer) was released from the prison as Yo- שר sef had predicted. Yosef had asked the to mention him to Pharaoh and have המשקים him released from jail. Yosef made this re- quest twice. Since he placed his trust in the ,instead of trusting in Hashem שר המשקים the Midrash says, Yosef was punished with an extra two years in prison – one year for each request.

The Midrash is very difficult to under- stand. Is there anything wrong with asking שר המשקים for help? Yosef knew that the was going to come before Pharaoh to serve שר him. Why shouldn’t he have asked the to mention him to Pharaoh so he המשקים could be released from the dungeon?

The Hazon Ish explained that what Yosef

won’t make much of a difference. But when a person is financially secure, he is more careful, because he does not want to com- promise their financial security.

Yosef dreamt big. He did not see himself as just a lowly slave. He saw himself as the son of Yaakov Avinu and the grandson of Yitzhak Avinu, as a member of a special family that has a special relationship with Hashem. And seeing himself this way en- abled him to stay composed and act in a no- ble, dignified manner under all circumstanc- es.

Let’s always remember who we are – that we are the descendants of Avraham, Yitzhak and Yaakov, and of so many great individu- als in our history. Let’s always remember that we belong to a special, ancient people, that we are Hashem’s beloved, chosen na- tion, that we are all princes and princesses. If we keep this in mind, we will act in a re- spectable, dignified and composed manner, even under stressful and difficult situations, as is befitting for members of Am Yisrael.