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    PARASHAT BALAK: BEING HONEST WITH OURSELVES

    Many years ago, I was
    learning with a peer in
    the Deal Synagogue,
    and we were having
    an argument regarding
    the laws of Mukseh
    on Shabbat. Suddenly, one of the leading
    Halachic scholars of our time, Rav Shmuel
    Pinhasi, walked in. We were thrilled to have
    the opportunity to approach him to resolve
    our disagreement. And so we reverently
    came to the sage, posed our question, and
    listened attentively to his response.
    When he finished speaking, we went back to
    our place, and we both said to one another,
    “You see, I’m right!”
    This incident showed me in the clearest
    possible way how we have a natural tendency
    to hear what we want hear, to confirm our
    ideas and biases, rather than allow them to
    be challenged and questioned. We don’t want
    to be shown that we’ve been wrong, that our
    decisions or opinions are incorrect. And so
    we always hear what we always thought to
    be correct.
    A dramatic example of this phenomenon, of
    hearing what one wants to hear, is Bilam,
    about whom we read in our Parasha, Parashat
    Balak.

    Balak, the king of Moab, sent messengers
    to Bilam, a gentile prophet, asking him
    to come to Moab and place a curse upon
    Beneh Yisrael. After the messengers
    arrived and submitted their request, G-d
    appeared to Bilam in a dream and said, “Lo
    Telech Imahem” – “Do not go with them”
    (22:12). The next morning, Bilam said to
    Balak’s men that he could not accept the
    mission, “because G-d refused to let me go
    with you” (22:13). Rashi explains that Bilam
    was telling the messengers, “I cannot go with
    you – but I can go with more distinguished
    dignitaries!”
    Bilam was an arrogant man, who craved
    honor and prestige. And, he despised Beneh
    Yisrael even more than Balak did, and
    very much wanted to place a curse upon
    them. Therefore, when Hashem told him,
    “Don’t go with them,” Bilam heard, “Don’t
    go with these men whom Balak sent to you,
    but go with more distinguished figures when
    he sends them to you!” Bilam heard not what
    Hashem actually told him, but rather what he
    wanted Hashem to tell him.
    The Gemara in Masechet Gittin (45a) tells
    the story of Rabbi Ilish, who was being held
    captive together with another man. One day,
    a raven came and began chirping. Rabbi Ilish

    turned to his fellow captive and asked if he
    understood the language of the birds. The
    man answered in the affirmative, and
    explained that the bird was saying, “Ilish –
    escape!” Rabbi Ilish realized that the bird was
    informing him that it was safe for him to run
    away from captivity. However, he knew that
    ravens cannot be trusted, and so he did not
    try to escape. Sometime later, a dove came
    and began chirping. Once again, the Rabbi’s
    fellow inmate told him that the bird was
    urging him to escape. Rabbi Ilish followed
    the dove’s advice, and safely escaped.
    A number of commentators noted that
    undoubtedly, Rabbi Ilish also understood
    the language of the birds. It is inconceivable,
    these commentators write, that this random
    inmate had more wisdom than the great Rabbi
    Ilish. The question, then, arises, why did
    Rabbi Ilish ask the other fellow to interpret
    the birds’ chirping? If he understood what the
    birds were saying, then why did he consult
    with his cellmate?
    Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz (1902-1979)
    explained that Rabbi Ilish didn’t trust his
    own interpretation. He very much wanted
    to hear the bird telling him that this was an
    auspicious time to escape from captivity.And
    so he feared that he would hear what he

    wanted to hear, and not what the bird was
    actually saying. He therefore consulted
    with his fellow inmate to get an objective
    explanation of the bird’s chirping.
    This is an important lesson about honesty
    and objectivity. The only way we will grow
    is if we live with the openness to hear the
    truth – even when it makes us uncomfortable,
    when it challenges our previous opinions
    and beliefs. Refusing to accept the truth is
    a quality associated with the wicked Bilam,
    whose passionate hatred for Beneh Yisrael
    prevented him from properly understanding
    G-d’s message. We are to do just the opposite
    – live with the humility and honesty to hear
    what Hashem tells us and to surrender to His
    will.