
08 Jul PARASHAT BALAK: BEING HONEST WITH OURSELVES
Many years ago, I was
learning with a peer in
the Deal Synagogue,
and we were having
an argument regarding
the laws of Mukseh
on Shabbat. Suddenly, one of the leading
Halachic scholars of our time, Rav Shmuel
Pinhasi, walked in. We were thrilled to have
the opportunity to approach him to resolve
our disagreement. And so we reverently
came to the sage, posed our question, and
listened attentively to his response.
When he finished speaking, we went back to
our place, and we both said to one another,
“You see, I’m right!”
This incident showed me in the clearest
possible way how we have a natural tendency
to hear what we want hear, to confirm our
ideas and biases, rather than allow them to
be challenged and questioned. We don’t want
to be shown that we’ve been wrong, that our
decisions or opinions are incorrect. And so
we always hear what we always thought to
be correct.
A dramatic example of this phenomenon, of
hearing what one wants to hear, is Bilam,
about whom we read in our Parasha, Parashat
Balak.
Balak, the king of Moab, sent messengers
to Bilam, a gentile prophet, asking him
to come to Moab and place a curse upon
Beneh Yisrael. After the messengers
arrived and submitted their request, G-d
appeared to Bilam in a dream and said, “Lo
Telech Imahem” – “Do not go with them”
(22:12). The next morning, Bilam said to
Balak’s men that he could not accept the
mission, “because G-d refused to let me go
with you” (22:13). Rashi explains that Bilam
was telling the messengers, “I cannot go with
you – but I can go with more distinguished
dignitaries!”
Bilam was an arrogant man, who craved
honor and prestige. And, he despised Beneh
Yisrael even more than Balak did, and
very much wanted to place a curse upon
them. Therefore, when Hashem told him,
“Don’t go with them,” Bilam heard, “Don’t
go with these men whom Balak sent to you,
but go with more distinguished figures when
he sends them to you!” Bilam heard not what
Hashem actually told him, but rather what he
wanted Hashem to tell him.
The Gemara in Masechet Gittin (45a) tells
the story of Rabbi Ilish, who was being held
captive together with another man. One day,
a raven came and began chirping. Rabbi Ilish
turned to his fellow captive and asked if he
understood the language of the birds. The
man answered in the affirmative, and
explained that the bird was saying, “Ilish –
escape!” Rabbi Ilish realized that the bird was
informing him that it was safe for him to run
away from captivity. However, he knew that
ravens cannot be trusted, and so he did not
try to escape. Sometime later, a dove came
and began chirping. Once again, the Rabbi’s
fellow inmate told him that the bird was
urging him to escape. Rabbi Ilish followed
the dove’s advice, and safely escaped.
A number of commentators noted that
undoubtedly, Rabbi Ilish also understood
the language of the birds. It is inconceivable,
these commentators write, that this random
inmate had more wisdom than the great Rabbi
Ilish. The question, then, arises, why did
Rabbi Ilish ask the other fellow to interpret
the birds’ chirping? If he understood what the
birds were saying, then why did he consult
with his cellmate?
Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz (1902-1979)
explained that Rabbi Ilish didn’t trust his
own interpretation. He very much wanted
to hear the bird telling him that this was an
auspicious time to escape from captivity.And
so he feared that he would hear what he
wanted to hear, and not what the bird was
actually saying. He therefore consulted
with his fellow inmate to get an objective
explanation of the bird’s chirping.
This is an important lesson about honesty
and objectivity. The only way we will grow
is if we live with the openness to hear the
truth – even when it makes us uncomfortable,
when it challenges our previous opinions
and beliefs. Refusing to accept the truth is
a quality associated with the wicked Bilam,
whose passionate hatred for Beneh Yisrael
prevented him from properly understanding
G-d’s message. We are to do just the opposite
– live with the humility and honesty to hear
what Hashem tells us and to surrender to His
will.