30 Sep PARSHA IN PRACTICE: SKILLS FOR BETTER LIVING BEREISHIS – A POSITIVE PERSPECTIVE

First things first
Parshas Bereishis
is all about the
beginnings: First creation, first
light, first day, first person, first
commandment, and of course, first
sin. After blessing mankind to be
fruitful, Hashem gives Adam his first
official mitzvah. Yes, it has to do with
trees and fruit, but it’s not what you
think.
While most of us might remember
that the first injunction to Adam was
to not eat from the Tree of Knowledge
of Good and Evil, a closer look at
the text reveals that, in fact, another
directive came first. “And Hashem
commanded man saying: From every
tree of the garden you shall eat”
(Bereishis 2:16).
The Meshech Chochmah explains

that this pasuk is not merely a setup
for the following one in which
Hashem tells Adam from which tree
he may not eat. Instead, Hashem
was formally instructing mankind
to partake of all the wonderful
enjoyments of the world. It was only
after first emphasizing all the positive
and exciting opportunities available
that Hashem introduced the one
restriction at hand. Presented in that
way, man was primed to focus on the
many positives, as opposed to the one
negative.
Unfortunately, the Meshech
Chochmah continues, when Adam
passed on these instructions to Chava,
this core message was lost. Instead of
enjoying all that was allowed, they
fixated on the one thing that was not,
and this obsession led to the violation

of their singular restriction.
There is a lot to learn from the
first mistake in history. A life of
Torah observance is filled with
so many wonderful, joyous
opportunities, and by focusing
on these over any limitations,
we can have the true outlook
Hashem intended. For
example, instead of describing
Shabbos to ourselves and our
children as a day when we cannot use
our phones, cannot drive, and cannot
go shopping, we can authentically
transmit the message that it is a joyful
day when we can get together with
family, can enjoy gourmet meals, and
can appreciate the weekly opportunity
to reconnect with Hashem.
Modern studies confirm that children
are more likely to change undesired

behaviors when we guide them toward
correct actions, instead of screaming
about what we do not want to see.
“No running” can be reframed as
“Please walk”; “Stop getting so angry”
as “Why don’t you try taking a deep
breath?”; “Put your phone away!” as
“Can you please join us at the table?”
If we haven’t had this positive
perspective before, there’s a first time
for everything!