03 Feb THE TEN COMMANDMENTS

The idea that out of
613 mitzvos Hashem
handpicked ten for special
highlighting on the two
luchos, the two tablets,
leads to a lot of fascinating
speculation. Let me share
some of my musings with

you.
The three most vital relationships for a man
are his marital relationship, his relationship
with his children and finally his relationship
with his parents. I have always wondered
why, of those three vital relationships, the Ten
Commandments only mentions one, namely,
“Kabeid es avicha v’es imecha – To honor
your father and your mother.” Why is it silent
about the spousal connection which is perhaps
the closest of all relationships and why does
it not make mention of the responsibility of
chinuch, to educate our children? Perhaps we
can answer that parents are the only one of
the three relationships that every person must
have for, while some people will sadly never
get married and others unfortunately will not
have children, everyone must have parents.
[As an important aside, I would like to note
that there is a difference between those who
don’t have children and those who never
marry, for while there are some who are
Divinely slated to be childless, everyone has a
specifically designed mate. As we are taught,
“Arboim yom kodem yetziras havlad, bas kol
machreses v’omeres tipa zu l’ploni – Forty
days before the creation of one’s embryo, the
Divine echo announces this drop is destined
for so and so.” If one does not marry, it is only
because they didn’t do the proper hishtadlus,
the proper effort.]
Getting back to our answer, one might wonder
about an orphan who never knew his parents
– like the Talmudic figure Abaye. [We are
taught that when Abaye was conceived his
father died and when he was born his mother
died.] The answer is that even when one’s
parents are no longer living, there is still a
mitzvah of kibud av v’eim, to honor one’s
parents, even after their demise. As a matter
of fact, the Zohar teaches that the mitzvah of
honoring parents is even greater when they are
already in the Afterlife since, at that time, they
rely solely on our sending to them packages of
merit through our charity and mitzvos.
A further observation (and question) I’ve
always had is why the Ten Commandments do
not include the most important of all mitzvos,
the study of Torah. After all, we are taught
that ‘Talmud Torah k’neged kulom,’ the study
of Torah equals all of the other mitzvos, and
we know that it is the very purpose of creation,
as it says in Pirkei Avos, “Ki l’kach notzarta
– It is for This [Torah] that you were created.”
Furthermore, when the Roman general
Vespasian told the great Rebbi Yochanan ben
Zakai that he was commissioned to destroy
Yerushalaim and he offered Rebbi Yochanan
ben Zakai a boon, Reb Yochanan asked him,
“Tein li Yavnah v’chachamehah – Grant me

clemency for the yeshiva of Yavnah and her
sages.” What he was saying is that, upon the
destruction of the Temple, the very future of
Klal Yisroel hinges upon Torah. As we are
taught, “Ein l’HaKodosh Boruch Hu b’olomo
ela daled amos shel halachah bilvad,” that all
that Hashem has in the world is the four cubits
of Torah decisions alone.”
You might answer that the Ten
Commandments are universals and for all
mankind, and therefore they don’t include the
mitzvah of Torah study. However, this is not
true for the Ten Commandments include the
Fourth Command of Shabbos and Shabbos
is reserved only for the Jewish People, as it
says, “Goi she’shavas chaiyav misah – A
gentile who keeps the Sabbath transgresses
a capital offence.” Then you might attempt
to answer that the Ten Commandments are
to be equally applicable to Jewish men and
Jewish women while the mitzvah of Torah
study is reserved only for men. But, the
idea that the Ten Commandments are totally
egalitarian is also incorrect, because the
Ninth Commandment, “Lo sa’ane v’rei’acha
eid shoker,” not to testify falsely about your
neighbor, is reserved only for men since
women do not give testimony in a Jewish
court. So, once again we are left perplexed
why the Ten Commandments do not include
the awesome mitzvah of Torah study.
Perhaps, you might next suggest that the
mitzvah of Torah study doesn’t fit into the
dual ‘thematics’ of the mitzvahs of the
Ten Commandments for, as we know, the
First Tablet discusses mitzvahs ‘bein adom
l’Makom,’ the commandments between
us and Hashem, like belief in G-d, the
prohibition against idolatry, Shabbos, etc.,
while the Second Tablet discusses the
mitzvahs ‘she’bein adom l’chaveiro,’ those
commandments between us and our fellow
man, such as the prohibitions against murder,
adultery, and kidnapping. You therefore
might argue that the study of Torah doesn’t
fit into this set-up for it’s not a relationship
mitzvah. This also is incorrect for the Torah
is very much a relationship activity between
us and Hashem as we are taught, “Yisroal,
v’Oraisah, v’Kudsha berich Hu, Chad hu –
The Jews, the Torah, and Hashem, are One.”
The way to become closest to G-d is by
embracing His writings, as Chassidim fondly
say, ‘When we daven, we are talking to
Hashem and when we learn Torah, Hashem
is talking to us.’ This is why after saying in
Krias Shema the commandment of “V’ahavta
es Hashem Elokecha,” that you shall love the
Lord your G-d, it is followed by the mitzvah
of Torah study, namely, “V’dibarta bam,” that
you should speak about Them [Torah]. So,
the study of Torah is very much a relationship
mitzvah and would have fit quite nicely on the
right side of the Ten Commandments. Why
then did Hashem not include it?
I’d like to suggest the possibility that Torah
study is indeed included as a very integral part
of the Fourth and Fifth Commandments. The

Fourth Commandment is to keep the Shabbos
day. The Torah dictates to us, “V’yom
haShvi’i Shabbos l’Hashem Elokecha – And
the Seventh day should be a day of rest to
Hashem your G-d.” This means that our
Shabbos pursuits should be G-dly ones. In
practical definition this translates to spending
more time in prayer; as we say, “Mizmor shir
l’yom haShabbos; tov l’hodos l’Hashem – A
song for the Shabbos day; it is good to thank
Hashem,” for while during the rest of the
week we are constantly dashing out of shul
to catch a bus or meet a client, Shabbos is the
one day each week when we should be able
to take our time in shul and linger over the
beautiful words of our tefillos. How sad that
so many people have become clock-watchers
in the synagogues on Shabbos and get tetchy
and irritable if the davening is going a few
minutes longer than usual. The other pursuit
of Shabbos dedicated to Hashem is of course
the study of Torah. Hashem wanted everyone
to have a chance to dedicate himself to the

study of Torah so He gave all of us a one-
day-a-week spiritual oasis called Shabbos for

Torah study.
The Fifth Commandment, honoring our
parents, also includes the mitzvah of Torah
study in a very concrete way for the Kitzur
Shulchan Aruch informs us that the best way
to honor our parents is to do as many mitzvahs
as we can for then the people who see us living
righteously will comment, ‘Look what a good
job his or her parents did in raising them.’
This is especially true when a child studies
Torah, as the Gemora comments about a great
Torah sage, “Ashrei yuladeto – Fortunate are
the parents who gave birth to him.” Thus, we
see that study of Torah is directly included in
the Fifth Commandment as well.
Here’s another fascinating observation about
the Ten Commandments. We all know that
there is beauty in symmetry. The human
face is perfectly symmetrical. Both eyes are
equidistant from the nose, which is perfectly
centered. Both ears are symmetrically
positioned with the mouth perfectly centered
as well. Surprisingly, the Ten Commandments
are absolutely not symmetrical. The right
side of the Ten Commandments, which speak
about our relationship with Hashem, starts
off with belief in G-d, which is a mitzvah
of the mind. Then it goes to not saying
Hashem’s name in vain, which is a mitzvah
of the mouth, finishing-off with Shabbos and
honoring your parents, which are mitzvos of
action. Then, surprisingly, the left side, which
speaks about our relationship with our fellow
man, does just the opposite – starting off with
the prohibitions against murder, kidnapping
and adultery, which are mitzvahs of action,
going on to not testifying falsely which is a
mitzvah of the mouth, and finally ending-off
with, “Lo sachmod,” not to covet, which is a
mitzvah of the mind. Why does It make this
switch-a-roo? Why such a reversal?
I once heard a beautiful explanation that, when
it comes to the mitzvahs between Hashem and

us, there are many people who say, ‘It’s enough
to have a Jewish heart. G-d doesn’t need my
prayers and rituals,’ to which Hashem replies,
‘That is incorrect. You must progress from
believing in Me with your mind, to honoring
Me with your mouth, and eventually to doing
mitzvahs for Me even with your actions.’ On
the other hand, when it comes to our relations
with our fellow men, many people have the
attitude, “‘Sticks and stones can break bones,
names won’t every hurt anyone,’ and what I
am thinking is surely no one’s business.” To
this sentiment, Hashem responds, ‘Absolutely
wrong. Not only must you behave with your
fellow man with proper actions, you must also
control your speech and even learn to regulate
your thoughts.’
Indeed, the Torah practices spiritual mind
control. As it says, “Lo sisnah es achicha
bilvavecha – You should not hate your friend
in your heart,” and, “Lo sistar – You shall
not bear a grudge.” This is why, referring
to us Jews, the Torah gives us the directive,
“Kedoshim tihiyu – You should be holy,” for
to be truly holy, one must be pure even in the
way they think.
In the merit of our Torah study and observance,
may Hashem bless us with long life, good
health, and everything wonderful.