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18 Jun TIPS FOR A SWEETER AND MORE PRODUCTIVE SUMMER
In our Maariv prayers,
we thank Hashem for
being, “Machalif es
hazmanim – Changing
the seasons.” Since it
adds spice and variety
to life, we acknowledge
our appreciation for this on a daily basis.
And although every season has its unique
delights, no time of the year elicits such
anticipation and excitement as the happy
months of summer. I’d like to discuss some
ideas to ensure that our vivid expectations
for summer should become all that we’ve
waited for – and that they will be spiritually
productive as well!
Before all else, let’s remember safety! A
major concern is with the roadways. Don’t
tackle those long drives to or from the
mountains when you’re bushed even before
your start the drive! Chas v’Shalo-m, if a
car becomes a bed, it will likely also become
a coffin! New drivers should be trained to
safely negotiate curvy country roads at safe
speeds and taught how to switch rapidly
between the ‘brights’ and dim headlights
correctly during the nighttime hours.
Impatient teens, anxious to squeeze every
available drop from vacation time, should
be lectured about the insanity of randomly
passing cars on narrow country roads. Fun-
seeking children should be sternly told that
New York is NOT a safe place to hitchhike,
and bicyclists must wear helmets – as it takes
only a millisecond to injure the brain!
Swimmers should be cautioned about the
absolute need for proper supervision and the
great danger of going ‘solo’ to the pool. Also,
remember that long exposures to the sun can
be unhealthy. Use a sun blocker!
Then, there’s the subject of ‘dreams.’ Not
the nighttime ones, but our daytime dreams!
Couples should discuss with each other what
they dream about for their summer pleasure.
For men, dreams might mean a Sunday ball
game, or ‘conking-out’ on the hammock. For
women, it might mean lounging by the pool
with the ladies, some brisk country jogging, or
driving through the nooks and crannies of the
mountains in order to browse in quaint shops
and malls. For some couples, the reverse
of these may be the truth. Still, whatever
our spouse’s summer hopes might be, let’s
try to bring them to fruition – for a happy
spouse is nicer to live with. Furthermore,
we will be properly fulfilling one of our main
objectives of life: For the women, being a
proper ‘helper;’ and for the men, fulfilling the
directive of ‘V’simach es ishto – Making his
wife happy.’
If we have some ‘free’ time in the summer,
reserve a nice chunk of it for ‘reconnecting’
with our loved ones. Because of the frantic
pace of life, especially during these harsh
economic times, many of us spend very little
time with our spouses and children. Therefore,
although we might be personally drained
and washed out, we must make sure that our
marriages and parental responsibilities get
some much needed attention as well.
Another avenue of attention for our free time
is to ‘find’ Torah this summer! As the posuk
teaches us, “Ki chaim heim l’motzeihem – It
(the Torah) brings life to those that find It.”
So, let’s rediscover the delights of learning
mishnayos (Join me on Kol Haloshon for
Mishna Yomis at (718) 906-6400!!!), for
reviewing the summer Torah portions, or
for sinking our teeth into a small masechta
with the self-challenge of finishing it over
the summer. And we might even consider
tackling a few sugyos b’iyun, in depth,
something which we have absolutely no
time for during the winter. While thinking
about learning, we might also try to help
our children get a head start, ensuring a
successful beginning of the new school year
by beginning with them the masechtos they
will be learning in the fall.
Another very rewarding campaign is to
make some time to learn the meaning of
those sections of our davening which we
don’t know as well (for example, the daily
shir shel yom, brich shmei, tachanun, etc.).
We will feel a great sense of accomplishment
from this since it will help us pray more
sincerely the rest of our lives! Now, that’s
time well spent!!
Let’s keep in mind that since the summer is
the season to recharge our batteries, a very
good prescription for this is Torah. This is
so, since it states clearly, “Toras Hashem
t’mimah, m’shivas nafesh – Hashem’s
Torah is pure, It rejuvenates the soul.”
Indeed, there are a lot of frustrated people
who find themselves eager to get back to
work simply because they don’t know what
to do with their time (they’re not athletic,
nor are they readers or socialites – not that
these types shouldn’t be concerned about
their learning as well!). Yet, if they would
but take the initiative to engage in a Torah
project, fulfillment and glorious pleasure is
right nearby! Let’s remember, as we try to
make our summer a happy one that, “Ein
simcha k’simchas HaTorah – There is no
greater happiness than the joy of Torah!”
Many of us will be sending our children
off to camp. One of the things parents
should insist upon (besides the brushing of
teeth) is that they write us a weekly letter.
If you feel you must, arrange with them
that if the letter doesn’t arrive neither will
their allowance. Explain that you must work
very hard, and sacrifice much, to send them
to camp which is a summer luxury. Thus,
it is only proper that they should willingly
share their thrills and excitements with you
on a regular basis. This arrangement will
accomplish many things. First, it will allow
them to fulfill weekly a beautiful mitzvah of
kibud av v’eim. Second, it will force them
to communicate with you and enhance your
connection with them as opposed to growing
apart from them while they’re away from
home. Third, this lesson in communication is
great training for their marital careers. It will
begin conditioning them about sharing their
happenings and feelings with others. Finally,
these letters will be a vehicle which you
could use to stay current with their spiritual
accomplishments in camp. In so doing, you
can spur them on to greater heights in Torah
and mitzvos.
We should also counsel our campers
(our children) on the importance of wisely
choosing their friends, reminding them that
we pray every day for Hashem to protect us
from bad influences, and reiterating how the
mishna in Pirkei Avos teaches us to acquire a
good friend for ourselves. Let’s also advise
them to be on the lookout for the lonely and
sad child, and teach them to strive, once and
awhile, to cheer up someone who is downcast
and melancholy.
I hope implementing these tips will prove
helpful and may Hashem bless all of us with a
very healthy happy and spiritually productive
summer!!