10 Dec VAYISHLACH: THE ATTRIBUTE OF BEING “ALONE”

This week’s parsha
contains the pasuk:
“And Yaakov
remained alone and a
man wrestled with
him until dawn”
[Bereishis 32:25]. The
Medrash sees a
connection between Yaakov remaining alone
and the “Aloneness” of the Almighty. Even
more strikingly, the Medrash states that
Yaakov attained a stature that made him
similar to the Ribono Shel Olam.
“And you shall walk in His ways” [Devorim
28:9] is one of the most fundamental mitzvos
of the Torah. Emulating G-d’s ways by acting
merciful (as He is Merciful), acting
compassionate (as He is Compassionate) and
so forth, is a primary religious obligation and
is the ultimate source for many of our
responsibilities towards our fellow man.
The Medrash states that in this incident
Yaakov achieved a significant spiritual
accomplishment by imitating one of the
Almighty’s attributes. Regarding the
Almighty, the pasuk says: “And Hashem
ALONE will be exalted on that day [Yeshaya
2:17] and here in VaYishlach the pasuk says:
“And Yaakov remained ALONE.” At this

moment Yaakov emulated the G-d-like
attribute of being alone.
The thrust of the pasuk “And Hashem
ALONE will be exalted” is that Hashem does
not need anything or anybody else to exist. He
can be alone and independent. Yaakov too
demonstrates this ability of going it alone, of
being able to survive by himself, as it were.
Rav Yeruchem states that this is a level that
every person try to achieve. A person should
try to reach completeness (shleimus) by
himself without the necessity of relying on
others.
Rav Yeruchem is not advising us to become
hermits. Rather, Rav Yeruchem is giving an
insight into the meaning of the teaching of a
famous Mishneh. “Ben Zoma states: Who is
the wise man? One who learns from everyone.
Who is the strong man? One who conquers
his evil inclination. Who is the wealthy man?
One who is satisfied with his lot. Who is
honored? One who honors creatures.” [Avos
4:1].
What do all these four things have in
common? The common denominator is that a
person can achieve these goals without the
help of others.

The Mishneh does not require a person to
have a good teacher to become a wise man.
That would make achieving wisdom
dependent on someone outside oneself. The
Mishneh precludes one from arguing, “I can’t
become a wise man, because I don’t have a
proper teacher.” Pirkei Avos counters, “No.
One can become a wise man on his own –
providing he is ready to learn from everyone.”
So it is with achieving strength. Strength does
not have to be measured in relationship to
another individual. (“I am stronger than he
is.”) One can be strong independently of
everyone else in the world – provided one
conquers his evil inclination. Strength is not
dependent on comparisons. Strength is
measured “bein adam l’atzmo” (between man
and himself).
The same can be said regarding wealth. It has
nothing to do with having more money than
my neighbor. If that were the case, I could
never be considered wealthy, for there is
always someone richer. True wealth only
depends on oneself (levado), alone and
independent. I can be the richest person in the
world if I am happy with my lot.
Finally, even honor, contrary to our
expectations, can be achieved independently.

Honor is not dependant on being given Shlishi
or Shishi or Maftir. Honor is determined by
whether one honors other creatures.
Rav Yeruchum points out as follows. This
Mishneh is emphasizing that in order to
achieve perfection, a person must be able to
function in a vacuum – as a “levado” [one
who is alone]. Wisdom, wealth, strength, and
honor do not need outsiders to be measured or
to be achieved. One achieves them through
the attribute of being “alone.”