05 Aug WHAT IS SINAS CHINAM?

With great relief, we’ve
arrived at Shabbos
Nachamu, 5785. The
days of mourning
are behind us and we
experience a Shabbos
Nachamu, a Shabbos
of comfort, which falls
this year on the very happy day of t’u
b’Av, the 15 th day of Av, as well.
The event of Shabbos Nachamu always
prompts the question, “Where is the
comfort?
There is still a mosque on the Temple
Mount, the guns of war aren’t silenced.
All the hostages have not been returned.
In Australia, 90,000 people march
with antisemitic ideas. Antisemitism
flourishes all over the globe.”
I believe the comfort lies in our
heightened awareness from the
lessons of the Three Weeks: a renewed
commitment to hope for the Moshiach
and to work to repair the sins that are
stalling the redemption from coming.
And, the number-one impediment to
the return of the Moshiach is the sin
of sinas chinam which destroyed the

Second Temple and is still festering in
our midst.
What is sinas chinam? Literally, it
means ‘hatred for nothing,’ while
commonl translated as ‘senseless
hatred’ or ‘baseless hatred.’ But, these
translations are puzzling. Who hates for
nothing? It is true that there are times
in our life when we might have hated
someone.
But, it was for a good reason. They cost
us a promotion. They cost our child not
to get a shidduch. They embarrassed
us in front of other people. The person
cheated us in business or caused us to
lose a good friend. But, to hate someone
for nothing? Who would be guilty of
such a crime?
Rav Zalman Sorotzkin, zt”l, zy”a,
explains sinas chinam with the fifth
Mishna in the second perek of Pirkei
Avos. There, it teaches us, “Al tadin es
chaveir’cha ad shetagi’a l’mimkomo –
Don’t judge your friend unless you can
put yourself in his shoes.” He might
have been nasty to you, but that’s only
after being the victim of a two-hour
long tirade from a shrewish wife. Or,

your friend might have treated you
shabbily and perhaps downright nastily,
but that’s only because she is crazed
with an off-the-derech child who is
causing her to act out because of her
frustrations and embarrassment. Rav
Sorotzkin says that if you would take
these circumstances into account, you
wouldn’t hate the person. Thus, it is
considered sinas chinam.
Another explanation of sinas chinam
is hate that is generated because of
jealously, such as the hate that Kayin
had for Hevel or the brothers had for
Yosef. Often, we don’t realize that the
root of our enmity is driven by jealousy.
But, this is not a good reason for a Jew
to hate another and it too is baseless
hatred.
I would like to discuss with you yet
another definition of sinas chinam.
There are times where our hate is
justified. The unfair division of a family
business, someone snatching a shidduch
from under our nose, a justified gripe
about an inheritance, and the list goes
on.
However, years have passed now.
What do we gain by holding on to our
justified enmity?
Twenty-two years passed since the
brothers lowered Yosef down into a
pit of snakes and scorpions and sold
him into what looked like perpetual
slavery. Who would have gained if
Yosef had held on to hatred towards
his brothers? Certainly, it would have
been justified, but what would have
happened to the Holy family of Klal
Yisroel?
Chinam also means ‘no gain;’ that it is
purposeless and without any benefit.
That is also the sin of sinas chinam; to
stubbornly refuse to bury the hatchet
even after many years have passed. It
is a sad truth that many families pass
on their feuds to their children saying,
‘We have nothing to do with that side
of the family.’ When asked why, the
parents might say, ‘It’s complicated
and it was a long time ago, but it was
bad and we have nothing to do with
them.’
That too is sinas chinam. No one gains
from such an attitude.
This is exactly the crime that the
retelling of Kamtza and Bar Kamtza is
meant to warn us against. The Gemara
in Mashectas Gittin teaches us that
a man told his secretary to invite his
friend Kamtza to his son’s wedding.
The secretary made a mistake and
invited Bar Kamtza, the host’s bitter

enemy instead. At the wedding, the
host saw Bar Kamtza sitting there
and accosted him with, ‘What are you
doing here?” Bar Kamtza responded,
“I was invited,” and the host replies,
‘Then it was certainly a mistake, so
leave.’ Bar Kamtza pleads, ‘Don’t
embarrass me. I’ll pay for my meal,’
but the host retorted, ‘No! Leave! I
can’t enjoy myself with you here.’ Bar
Kamtza beseeches, ‘I’ll pay for half
the wedding!” and the host again said
no. Then, in desperation, Bar Kamtza
offered to pay for the entire wedding
but the host turned to his ushers and
unceremoniously had Bar Kamtza
evicted from the wedding. Totally
humiliated, Bar Kamtza said to himself,
‘The rabbis were there and they didn’t
say anything. That means that they
agree with such frightful behavior!’ and
he then went and slandered us to the
Romans, which led to the destruction of
Yerushalyim.
The message is clear. The host couldn’t
put aside his hatred, even if he was to
get a free wedding by doing so. The
stubbornness of putting aside one’s
enmity is the toxic sin of sinas chinam.
On Shabbos Nachamu, each and every
one of us needs to ask ourselves,
‘What old hatred, although justified,
can we put aside and forgive and make
amends?’
In that merit, the Moshiach will
certainly be right around the corner with
the rebuilding of the Beis HaMikdash,
speedily in our days.