04 May Speak Your Vues
SPEAK YOUR VUES WITH THE VUES MASTER
SMOKING
Dear Vues Master:
A man smoking a pipe was asked what pleasure he derives from it. “I don’t smoke for pleasure. Having the pipe in my mouth calms my nerves.” “But,” his friend asked, “If that’s all you need it for, why bother with tobacco?” Looking at him incredulously, the smoker responded: “If the pipe didn’t have tobacco, how would I know when to stop smoking?” MD
Vues Master’s Note: Or better yet if there is no tobacco you can’t even begin to smoke! I guess weed is better as they are legalizing it but Menthol is not. We are so mixed up. Is Trans fat good or not?
POLITICS Dear Vues Master: The King & the weatherman
The King wanted to go fishing, and he asked the royal weather forecaster the forecast for the next few hours.
The palace meteorologist assured him that there was no chance of rain.
So the King and the Queen went fishing. On the way he met a man with a fishing pole riding on a donkey, and he asked the man if the fish were biting.
The fisherman said, “Your Majesty, you should return to the palace! In just a short time I expect a huge rain storm.”
The King replied: “I hold the palace meteorologist in high regard. He is an educated and experienced professional. Besides, I pay him very high wages. He gave me a very different forecast. I trust him.”
So the King continued on his way.
However, in a short time a torrential rain fell from the sky. The King and Queen were totally soaked.
Furious, the King returned to the palace and gave the order to fire the meteorologist.
Then he summoned the fisherman and offered him the prestigious position of royal forecaster.
The fisherman said, “Your Majesty, I do not know anything about forecasting. I obtain my information from my donkey. If I see my donkey’s ears drooping, it means with certainty that it will rain.”
So the King hired the donkey.
And so began the practice of hiring dumb asses to work in influential positions of government.
And thus, the symbol of the democrat party was born.
The practice is unbroken to this day. RE
Vues Master’s Note: Is this not what politics and Government is all about. They make rules for others but not for themselves and make rules so it should be impossible to keep it!
SHUL Dear Vues Master:
“An Open Letter To My Neighbour in Shul”
Vues Master’s Note: What happened to just talking and socializing during the Kiddush?
KORIM IN SHUL Dear Vues Master:
An old עם הארץ asked his friend what the קהל does during כורעים on יום כיפור. His friend replied that even though it’s top secret, he’ll reveal it to him. “On ערב יום כיפור,” he said, “they hide muffins in their טלית bags and the next day, during כורעים, they eat them.” The old man was pleased that this great secret was revealed to him. On יום כיפור, he did כורעים with the rest of the קהל, but remained crouched on the floor after everyone else got up. Concerned, people asked him if he was alright. “I’m fine,” he said. “But I only have a few teeth in my mouth, so it takes me longer to eat than it takes you.” KB
Vues Master’s Note: This joke has been chewed over many times.
HATZALATHON Dear Vues Master:
Dear Friend,
We are a group most comfortable operating behind the scenes, doing what we do, not stepping out into the limelight or writing letters.
But we are reaching out to you, our dear brothers and sisters, because we need you.
But who are we?
Some people call us heroes. Some say we’re courageous. The ad campaign even called us “Supermen. “ We feel uncomfortable with these titles.
So who are we? Simply put, we’re family. We’re a band of brothers – your brothers. We’re people who undertook to be part of a group that is devoted 24/7 to all of you.
We are Hatzolah.
As members of Hatzolah, we often have to make certain decisions, putting other people’s lives before the time we get to spend with our family, but, of course, we know that there is no greater honor, no greater deed, no greater zechus that stopping whatever we are doing and going to help someone in a medical crisis. Our families feel the same way, too. They know how important and necessary our work is, and they encourage us, with amazing selflessness and altruism, to keep stepping out there, day after day and night after night, to help others they don’t even know.
Because that’s what Hatzolah does.
You are fortunate when you don’t need our services, but when you do, you should be comforted by the knowledge that we are always just a phone call away, ready and eager to drop everything, putting our lives on hold, for you. For every single one of you.
All year, when people are in need, they turn to Hatzolah. At this time, Hatzolah is turning to you.
On Thursday, April 29, the eve of Lag Ba’omer, Hatzolah of Flatbush will be holding a vital fundraiser, whose success will be dependent on your involvement.
We at Hatzolah is counting on you.
By supporting us, your Hatzolah members, you will be showing just how much we mean to you.
Hatzolah of Flatbush’s budget is $2 million annually. The goal of this upcoming campaign is to raise $1.5 million in support of 229 EMTs, 41 paramedics, and 15 dispatchers, the people who make up Hatzolah of Flatbush.
Last year’s campaign helped replace all ambulance stretchers with motorized stretchers and allowed Hatzolah to undertake capital improvements to its facilities. This year, Hatzolah needs to replace all 41 paramedic monitors by year’s end at a cost of $1.5 million. We desperately need your help in this campaign – the only Hatzolah fundraiser of the year.
We at Hatzolah will always be there for you. That’s our mantra. But please, at this time, be there for us. On April 29, please respond generously, helping Hatzolah help you. JM
Vues Master’s Note: Despite the fact that Hatzalathon is over we can still continue to donate.
VACCINES Dear Vues Master:
Hi there, I’m Leslie, and I’m a high school teacher. I was wondering how to convince my students and their parents to realize the vaccine value, so I searched for any information on that. That’s how I found your page (https://jewishvues.com/letters-to-the-edito/speak-your-vues-137/). First of all, thanks a lot for that starting point in my preparation for a speech with students and parents. Your page was informative, and I checked your resources to find the page with arguments I wanted to use in conversation. I expected to read a consistent and compelling story about the importance of the vaccine. Too bad, there was nothing like that. Would you like to add it as an additional resource? I believe that sharing this page is a great chance to save someone’s life. And thanks a lot for your work, I know many readers appreciate it too! Warmly, Leslie
Vues Master’s Note: I find \that they are pushing this vaccine on us and not being transparent as they still don’t know the long term affects of it.
BEHIND THE SCENES Dear Vues Master:
The Chasam Sofer( Parshas Emor) writes: ” The Am Haoretz who supports Torah has an advantage over the Talmid Chacham who learns. When he supports Torah he is rewarded even if the Talmid Chacham is negligent and is not learning, what should he have done and why should he lose out” .
The Netziv said Pshat on the Pasuk שלום רב לאהבי תורתיך- ואין למו מכשול Ohavei Toirosecho refers to the supporters of Torah. On them it is said Ein Lomo Michshol. For them things can’t go wrong. They will be rewarded regardless if the Talmidei Chachamim learns or not.
The Chasam Sofer’s Sevara (logic) would probably apply also for the wives who send their husbands to learn and wait at home for them. They too should be rewarded even if their husbands go to the Bais Hamedrash and Batel (waste) their time there. What else could she have done? MF
Vues Master’s Note: That is why Zevulun got his bracha before Yissachar as per the Chafetz Chaim.
TRUTH
קבל את האמת If you have expectations then you will be disappointed. FM
Vues Master’s Note: How valid amd pointed this letter is.
ANOTHER TRUTH Dear Vues Master:
Don’t look down on those who have Do look up on those who have
LK
Vues Master’s Note: But what if his suit is different than mine or his hat is different than mine? Or if he does not wear a hat. Don’t judge a book by it’s cover.
BAAL KERI IS TAMEI Dear Vues Master:
John Kerry is not a friend of Israel.
Vues Master’s Note: Don’t you dare call him an anti semite. He is just against the State of Israel which happens to be run and owned by Jews but his hatred is coincidental. He is not an Anti Semite, if you don’t believe it you can even as Ilan Omar yimach shema and the rest of the Anti Semitic squad.
PRAYER Dear Vues Master:
Now is the time for prayer. RUP
Vues Master’s Note: Thanks for this heartfelt poem. It is very inspiring.
DONNY MORRIS Dear Vues Master:
I never met Donny Morris z”l but like thousands of others I
Vues Master’s Note: No words. We can’t understand!
TEARS Dear Vues Master:
The Gates of Tears Are Never Closed-IN MERON! I’ve been crying 45 tears for the 45 Korbonos- Kedoshim at Meron Tragedy. Shaare Dimoos Lo Ninalu as Avraham Fried sings so beautifully on his Bring The House Down album. Rabbi Frand says how the Kohein Godol had to go into the Kodesh Hekedoshim on Yom Kippur to undo the teffillah of the traveler who davens that it shouldn’t rain on him not to get wet. Why is he so selfish to prevent rain from falling? Doesn’t he also needs rain? Rabbi Frand goes on to answer that he only krechtz; Oy, I’m getting wet nebach! The Koach of a KRECHTZ! That’s what the holiest man, the Kohein Godol, on the holiest day-Yom Kippur, had to go into the holiest place-the Kodosh Hakedoshim, and undo the traveler’s Krechtz. On Erev Shabbos, Lag Bomer-I KRECHTZED and cried 45 times for the Niftorim who perished in Meron R”L. Rav Yaakov Kaminetsky ZTL and Rav Shach ZT”L both said to look into a bentcher when you bentch as a shmirah when there is tzoros by Klal Yisroel. For Divrei Chizuk and Divrei Hisorreros , listen to my Rav in Monsey-Mishlei Erev Shabbos Lag- Bomer [Kol Haloshon-718 906 6432 press 2 then shiur# 2333.] Please have in mind by hadlokas neiros erev Shabbos to cry for all the tzebrochena families & Cholim.! My Rav says Mah equals 45. Mah Nomer Mah Nidaber Ma Nitzdek-Mah Hashem Shoel -Yiras Hashem. RMS
Vues Master’s Note: We see a tremendous Kiddush Hashem from some of the loved ones sitting Shiva how they have such Emunah. Wow what a lesson for all of us. May we all be consoled!
RABBI LEAVING Dear Vues Master:
A רב was saying farewell to his קהילה for the last time. He shook the hand of an elderly congregant as he walked out. The man said “Your successor won’t be as good as you.” “Nonsense,” replied the רב in a flattered tone. “No, really,” said the old man. “I’ve been here under five different rabbis and each new one has been worse than the last.” UH
Vues Master’s Note: Why don’t we appreciate our Rabbonim. Enjoy them they have so much to offer. We are always looking for the next new flavor |