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Speak Your Vues

SHIDDUCH CRISIS REVISITED

Dear Editor:

In your response to this letter you point out that the shidduch resume is simply a collection of facts. However, I find that the resume is often highly curated – meaning to say it has a lot of non-factual information. Often there is misinformation and the references are often chosen to give inaccurate representations. I suggest that a date can be set up more simply and if a first date goes well, then investigations should take place.

Mimi G

Editor’s Note: Many people would disagree with you since money and time shouldn’t be wasted if the match wouldn’t be compatible. The resume is used as a starting point of information and the person would then move on from there.

REPLACE TV LISTINGS

Dear Editor:

Please don’t take the crazy comments about Ashkenazim and Sefardim seriously. I guess these people don’t know how to take a joke. They are probably the same type of people who create a whole scandal when Trump says something and they don’t get his sense of humor. I think Rabbi Mansour is not saying that “We are better than you.” I am Ashkenaz, by the way.

I think you should replace the TV listings with a listing of famous yahrzeits and birthdays that happen during the week of printing. It would be interesting if you would put interesting historical facts that occurred as well. You can decide if you would print it regarding the secular dates or rather the Yiddish dates.

Editor’s Note: That is a very interesting idea that would require time and effort to arrange. Please contact us if you are interested in being that person to take care of it.

PROMOTE AHAVAS CHINAM REVISITED

Dear Editor:

Further clarification on my past two letters, because it seems you haven’t quite understood my point yet. Answering me with “there is no problem with talking about differences between minhagim” is agreeing with me. I agree, there is no problem with talking about differences in minhagim; both Ashkenazim and Sefardim have beautiful minhagim, and I wish we would talk about them more! The problem is that this is not what you did! You don’t quite seem to understand that!

There is a problem with making fun of each other! Saying something like: The difference between us is “Passion” is not a difference in minhagim no matter what you think!

Don’t tell me that it’s just for comedic purposes that I “need a sense of humor“. You should realize that while this is “a magazine for laymen”, it is also one meant for a Jewish family, and I for one don’t want to have my children reading such things. How can you call this a kosher magazine if it makes fun of the people who keep kosher? Just because my method of keeping Judaism is different from theirs doesn’t mean that we have to make fun of each other for it! Why are you, to quote Shifra M; trying to make it seem like “ the Ashkenazic culture is less exciting”? Would you want your children to grow up thinking that they were less than other people? We are all Jews here, and there is no reason for us to make it look like one version is better than the other. Sefardim are not better than Ashkenazim, Yemenites aren’t better than Yekis, and Chassidim aren’t better than Litvaks. There is no reason for us to publicly pretend that “the grass is greener on the other side”.

Hoping that you will finally realize your mistake,

Penina Strauss

Editor’s Note: It seems that you were given the impression that some people expressed that certain Jewish sects are better or perceived as better than another. Everyone on the editorial board completely agrees with you.

TUITION CRISIS

Dear Editor:

I’m sure I don’t need to go into the details regarding the tuition crisis in the frum world. Suffice it to say that most frum families struggle to pay tuition for their children, and the vast majority of families receive some type of financial aid.

In Central New Jersey, a program was implemented a few years ago, called TuitionMAX, and I believe it can be used as a model for other areas, to try and alleviate this burden.

The program is run under the Federation of the Greater MetroWest. As such, it is not limited to Orthodox schools – it includes 2 Orthodox schools, 1 Conservative school, and 1 non-specific Jewish school.

A generous family supplied a grant to cap the tuition that any parent pays. The percentage is based on where your gross adjusted income falls, but it ranges from 15% – 18%. So, for example, if your total household income is $150,000, your tuition will be capped at 15%, which is $22,500. It doesn’t matter if you have 3 kids or 10 kids in the school, that is what your tuition is. (If your total is less, obviously you pay less – this is a cap, not a tuition calculator).

This has had a major impact on schools in the Central NJ area. I have friends who’ve told me that it has made things significantly easier for them. I’ve heard that people have considered having more children, because now tuition wouldn’t be as much of a financial factor. It has also attracted people to the area.

I think we need to get the support of some of the big baalei tzedakah – Rechnitz, Herzka, and others. With their backing, a program like this can be implemented, and can alleviate a huge burden from thousands of families.

Joel K

Editor’s Note: I find your idea interesting since I am sure if you thought about it you would realize these gevirim are already helping the yeshivos a ton. Do you want to put a bigger burden on these gevirim? It’s easy for you to spend their money…