01 Sep SPEAK YOUR VUES WITH THE VUES MASTER
Please note that the author of Speak Your Vues is in no way affiliated with the publisher of
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one has any issues with any of the views, please write a letter to the Vues Master.
TRAFFIC
Dear Vues Master,
Very exciting news came out of Camp Kaylie this past week-
end that should have plenty of Kaylie campers, parents and
staff talking. After years of having the boys attend for the
first month and the girls for the second month, Kaylie is now
moving to a full-summer model for both boys and girls.
With the addition of another campus, the camp will operate
full summers for both divisions. That means campers will
have the opportunity to spend the entire summer at Kaylie
rather than having their camp experience limited to half a
summer. For families who have watched their children love
Kaylie, this is certainly welcome news.
Of course, this announcement also raises plenty of questions.
Where exactly is the new campus? Will it be nearby, or will
the boys and girls be operating at separate locations some
distance apart?
And perhaps the biggest question for the staff: How will the
staff be split up? Will there be completely separate staffs for
the boys’ and girls’ campuses, or will some staff members
move between the two? What will this mean for the counsel-
ors and other longtime Kaylie staff members?
And then there is the question everyone seems to be asking:
Who is getting Rabbi Rosner?
A full summer at Kaylie for both boys and girls is certainly a
major change. It will be fascinating to see how this new setup
comes together and what it means for the future of Camp
Kaylie.
AL
VUES MASTER’S NOTE: Everything will come out over
the next week or two directly from Camp Director Rabbi Eli
Brazil, and it will definitely be exciting.
AMERICAN JEWS DESERVE CLARITY FROM
JD VANCE
Dear Vues Master
After listening to Vice President JD Vance, I was left with
some very mixed feelings.
I appreciate his willingness to speak openly about his faith.
Young men especially need leaders comfortable talking
about religion and values rather than treating faith as some-
thing that must be kept private.
I also agree with his belief that young Jewish Americans and
young Americans from other faith communities have much
to learn from one another. There is an opportunity to build
meaningful relationships based on shared values, and I hope
those conversations can continue.
On foreign policy, I believe the Vice President is absolutely
correct that America’s interests must come first. That should
be the foundation of American foreign policy.
But when it comes to Jewish safety, I have serious concerns.
Vance cares about Jewish safety like the wolf cared about
Little Red Riding Hood’s safety. The very fact that this con-
versation needed to take place off camera because of con-
cerns about offending his Jew-hating base is deeply trou-
bling. If the Vice President is serious about standing with the
Jewish community, he should not have to hide those conver-
sations from the public.
And then there is Tucker Carlson. Vance continues to dodge
the question rather than unequivocally condemning Carlson,
who has even called for President Trump’s immediate re-
moval. That silence makes it increasingly difficult for Amer-
ican Jews to know where he truly stands.
I hope Republican Jews step up for Marco Rubio in the pri-
maries. Our community deserves leaders whose commitment
to Jewish safety is clear, consistent and unquestionable.
HT
VUES MASTER’S NOTE: Republican Jews should rally
behind Marco Rubio. His judgment, principles, and unwav-
ering commitment to Israel and Jewish safety make him the
stronger choice.
A SUBJECT WORTH TEACHING
Dear Vues Master,
In reference to your August 26–September 1 edition, the
question posed to Rabbanim and Jewish educators was:
“What is one subject that they do not teach in yeshivas that
they should?”
My answer is: With the thousands of talmidim who have just
left for yeshivas—or, more correctly, yeshivot—in Eretz Yis-
rael for a year of study or longer, wouldn’t Hebrew language
instruction, or at least a foundation in conversational He-
brew, be important to teach in our high schools? This should
include basic dikduk (grammar), conversational skills, and
key words and phrases.
Have the administrators and parent education committees of
our yeshivas seriously considered this very important sub-
ject? Hebrew should not be a foreign language to us. It
should not simply be offered as a foreign-language option
alongside Spanish, French, or Russian, if those languages are
still requirements as they were in my day.
What about the history of the modern State of Israel? Are our
students being taught about the sacrifices made by the Chay-
alei Tzahal and by those who have lost their lives since the
establishment of the State and the War of Independence in
1948?
Our educators should undertake a thorough review and anal-
ysis of the priorities of the yeshiva curriculum. We need to
ask whether we are providing our students with
the knowledge and skills they need—not only
for their academic education, but also to under-
stand and participate meaningfully in the Jew-
ish world in which they live.
Alan Blumenthal
A concerned grandparent
VUES MASTER’S NOTE: Many schools are
still teaching “Ivris” and Hebrew needed for
learning, not living. The only schools that teach
about the modern state of Israel are Modern
Orthodox, and even then it is a paltry educa-
tion.
CAN I AFFORD TO SEND MY SUIT
TO THE CLEANERS THIS YOM
TOV?
Dear Vues Master:
Yes. You read the title of this article correctly.
This is the thought going through my head two
weeks before Yom Tov.
Baruch Hashem, I have several kids, a beauti-
ful family, and a beautiful home. I’m in my
mid-thirties, and at one point, just a few years
ago, I was financially successful. I was the one
family members called when they needed fi-
nancial help.
When one of my siblings couldn’t afford a car,
I helped them get one. When another sibling
was struggling with grocery bills, I would pay
for them. When one was going through a messy
divorce, I helped them get by. When a relative
needed emergency dental work, I covered it.
A few years ago, my business took a turn for
the worse. I remained positive, hoping the mar-
ket would turn around, but I can’t just hope. So
I also pivoted and took on more work just to get
by.
When I write “get by,” I mean more like a jug-
gle. I felt like a juggler.
Even when the schools my children attend
gave us a significant break, we still couldn’t get
by. We’re constantly behind on our mortgage
and car insurance payments.
My wife works really hard and does relatively
well, doing the most she can while being an
amazing mother. It just seems like we can’t get
by.
I remember when all of this started. My busi-
ness took a hit. We couldn’t pay for the basics.
Things were spiraling. I remember once being
one day away from missing three mortgage
payments consecutively, which would have
been disastrous.
I asked for help from one of our close relatives,
and for three months he paid our mortgage. It
was an incredible kindness. At that time, I was
restructuring and was barely making ends
meet. Our relative, who is, Baruch Hashem,
successful, told us then that he is not a bank.
Basically, we got the hint not to ask for any
more help.
It was a strange, mixed feeling. On the one
hand, I was so grateful and have tremendous
hakoras hatov. On the other hand, I felt like a
piece of chewing gum that had been discarded
without even making it to the trash.
I’ve learned not to ask him, or anyone, for help
anymore, even though we and our kids spend
many Shabbosim together. I feel like he doesn’t
even realize that behind every smile I put on,
there’s pain.
Does your heart ever skip a beat at the cash reg-
ister?
Mine does. Constantly.
Do you always have to check your balance be-
fore going in to buy bread, eggs, and the ba-
sics?
I do.
School and the Yamim Tovim are coming up
quickly. I just went to the uniform store. The
bill was over $500 for my daughters: a couple
of uniform skirts, shirts, and a sweater for each
of them.
That was all I had in my account, and I was
going to use it for car insurance and the electric
bill.
The juggling continues.
For the summer, I bought fans for each bed-
room to save on the electric bill instead of run-
ning the AC full blast.
Baruch Hashem, we live in a community
where, at certain times of the year, you can get
subsidies on groceries, shoes, and other cloth-
ing. I couldn’t get my wife to agree to go, and I
don’t blame her. She works hard and wants our
kids to have “normal, beautiful shoes.”
I would remember their shoe sizes and some-
times go to the gemach store myself, swallow-
ing my shame.
My siblings have some daughters who are a bit
older than mine, so they send hand-me-downs.
They were, at one point, beautiful and usually
usable. I can’t be picky, even though I some-
times feel like some of the clothing belongs in
the bin.
Then I think: What right do I have to feel this
way? They’re trying to help.
Also, as a guy, a baal habayis, I don’t really
have anyone to discuss this with. I don’t feel
comfortable, and I feel embarrassed.
If someone I used to give tzedakah to came to
me now, I would say, “I’m so sorry, I’m tight
right now.”
I don’t talk to anyone about my feelings, except
to my Tehillim. Then I can talk and not stop.
Baruch Hashem for Rabbi Brog and Rabbi Bi-
derman. I don’t know what strength I could
draw on if I didn’t have their chizuk, divrei To-
rah, and stories.
I feel the weight constantly on my shoulders. I
also owe childhood friends and relatives a sig-
nificant amount of money, and I feel embar-
rassed every time I see them.
I’m trying my best.
I don’t spend on myself. I’ve had the same few
suits for the past few years. Would you believe
me if I told you I hadn’t bought myself a new
pair of shoes in over two years?
They’re still good, with a little shoe polish.
When I go for a haircut and the barber asks,
“How do you want to do your beard?” I reply
with a chuckle, “I’ll do that myself later. I’m
just here for a haircut, thanks!”
Sometimes, when my beard isn’t trimmed per-
fectly, my wife says, “I think the barber didn’t
do such a great job.”
I smile.
She doesn’t know it was me who trimmed my
beard.
My wife is on the same page as I am, and she
doesn’t spend much on herself anymore either.
She doesn’t know how much I’m juggling. I
don’t tell her the full extent anymore. It’s
stressful for her; I see it on her face.
She recently asked if we could buy school sup-
plies yet.
I answered, “Next week, iy”H.”
As a father and husband, you want to feel able
to provide the basics of the basics.
Is that even a phrase, “the basics of the basics”?
Well, it definitely resonates with me.
I’d rather spend any “extra” cash on my kids
and wife.
Do you ever go to the gas station and only put
in $10 of gas?
I do.
That’s all I can do sometimes.
My parents and in-laws aren’t in a position to
help. They usually don’t ask because they can’t
help me, and that’s too painful for them as well.
I remember my mother-in-law, who is selfless
and caring, recently asking me how much tu-
ition is for all my kids this coming year.
I told her the schools really worked with me,
with dignity, Baruch Hashem, and that it’s
about $3,000 a month.
I saw the pain in her eyes, how she wished she
could help.
Anyone with a family of seven knows how
much the weekly grocery bill is. With all the
other expenses, it’s a nes nigla, an open mira-
cle, how we get by.
I’m not here to complain.
I just want people to be aware.
I’ve learned not to put my trust in people, only
in Hashem, the One who really provides.
The reason I decided to write this is so people
know what’s going on around them.
If you’re a grandparent, uncle, or parent in a
position to help a family member, please do.
They shouldn’t feel alone.
And even if you can’t help, maybe acknowl-
edge the situation. Give chizuk. Give a good
word.
“I know you’re trying really hard and doing
your best.”
“B’ezras Hashem, better times are coming.”
I just feel alone and isolated.
I guess it’s also because I’m a very optimistic
and positive person, and sometimes I expect
others to be the same.
I was recently in a store and saw someone who
really hurt and embarrassed me in the past.
Someone who, if he’d really wanted to, could
have saved me from enormous shame, but
chose not to.
I felt anger, and a little hatred, toward him.
Then I saw one of his children with him. The
child didn’t look emotionally well.
I realized again that everyone is going through
something, some sort of challenge, whether it’s
illness, shidduchim, parnassah, marriage is-
sues, depression, kids being bullied, work is-
sues, legal problems, infertility, family issues,
kids’ social issues, chinuch, getting kids into
school, material issues. The list goes on.
I decided to try to forgive him, as best I can.
Not just with words, but with my heart.
I’m still not there.
I hope to be soon.
As we get closer to Rosh Hashanah, the day of
judgment, I hope and daven that we should all
be judged not as we judge others, but as a lov-
ing father and mother judge their child.
Hashem can make things wonderful in the
blink of an eye.
Teshuas Hashem k’heref ayin.
As of now, I don’t know if I’ll be able to send
my suit to the cleaners for Yom Tov.
But I’m confident that whatever happens, it’s
all for the good.
Aaron Simon
VUES MASTER’S NOTE: We can all learn a
lesson from you about forgiveness, trust in
Hashem, and trying not to judge others. We all
have our struggles. May Hashem answer your
tefilos for good, and may easier times come
your way this year.
LOOK IN THE MIRROR
Dear Vues Master:
So much has been said about Tefilah-
And talk of zechus for Limud Torah
But what about our parents dear
Taking care of us was
Their life’s CAREER
So take a minute
Peruse your mirror and see
Which of the following
Is meant for “me”
For instance:
Would anyone leave a parent sleep when a
chance happens that you can sell for a fortune a
sought after diamond that is under your par-
ent’s pillow?
Has anyone seen a person tying their parent’s
shoes?
Have we stood up when a parent comes into a
room
Have we spoken in a loud tone to a parent?
Do we quickly run to do what a parent requests
or do we respond “ I will do it “later” (and ac-
tually never do”
Have we made sure that a parent sitting at our
table is included and never made to feel like a
“fifth wheel”?
When a parent says something you don’t like
-do you shrug your shoulder- make a grimace
or roll your eyes
Or do you simply answer in a strident tone ex-
pressing your disfavor.
DO you put your parent on HOLD for long
while getting another phone call or
do you simply ignore your parent’s call while
speaking to someone else
In a crowd, do you turn away from your parent
when a friend appears, forgetting to introduce
or include your parent thus leaving them feel-
ing awkward or insignificant?
Do you take for granted gifts from parents and
don’t even mention them at dinner etc express-
ing your gratitude or do you feel that gifts are “
coming” to you?
If you find yourself in any niche above
Don’t simply say,” oh no not me”
And walk away conveniently
Look in the mirror At your reflection
Don’t give this list A quick rejection
We’re only human
And we can be in error
And here’s our chance
To be much better
And in that zechus
This year we’ll see
A wonderful year
Best it can be!!
Shanah Tovah
Rachel Laufer Fischer
VUES MASTER’S NOTE: Kibbud Av v’Em
is certainly one of the hardest mitzvos. May
we all have the zechus to do this mitzvah
properly.
SHHHHHHHHH!!!
Dear Vues Master:
I was recently a guest for Shabbos with my
family and davened at our hosts’ shul. While
the davening was beautiful and the singing
was truly inspiring, the amount of talking was
deeply disappointing. Where I usually daven,
not a word is spoken, making it a true pleasure
to daven.
At this shul, I was in the women’s section,
which was separated from the men’s section
by only a curtain. I could clearly hear discus-
sions about Dan’s Deals, business matters,
and various other topics. Aside from the se-
verity of the aveira—as it is written that the
sin is too great to bear—this behavior is high-
ly disturbing to those who come to daven.
With Rosh Hashanah approaching, I appeal to
those who talk during davening to please try
to work on this. If you must converse, please
step outside so you do not disturb those who
come to shul to daven.
Thank you,
Signed,
Someone who comes to shul to daven
VUES MASTER’S NOTE: In the wise
words of the Miami Boys Choir: We need
you, we need your tefilah, each and every Yid
can bring the geulah. Don’t talk (shh, shh, just
daven, so your tefilah can reach Hashem!
TRAFFIC
Dear Vues Master:
The traffic is back!! The entire summer, I was
in Brooklyn, and it was so easy to find a park-
ing spot in Boro Park. This past weekend, it
took me a half hour to find a spot on 13th Av-
enue. I guess everyone is back!
KL
Vues Master’s Note: I guess next summer
you will appreciate it that much more!
HOMEWORK
Dear Vues Master:
Homework is like global warming. Many “ex-
perts” are afraid to come out against it, lest
they be banished by the establishment.
I believe that homework can be unhealthy and
sometimes traumatic. And the real question is:
Where is the data? There have been tons of
studies, and the results are inconclusive. Even
the people who believe in homework admit
that below eighth grade, the benefits are mini-
mal. So why are we making kids, parents, and
even teachers suffer when we don’t even
know if there is any real benefit?
To be clear, I am not criticizing hardworking
Rebbeim, Morahs, and Menahelim. I have im-
mense respect for their hard work and devo-
tion to our children, as well as the sacrifices
they make. I believe they are following a sys-
tem that is, for the most part, a great system. I
am questioning one small yet highly stressful
aspect of that system, not the people who ex-
ecute it.
The clinical data mostly analyzes whether
kids benefit academically. But what about
emotional health? Is there a study that exam-
ines whether homework causes stress and
anxiety? (Do we even need a study for this?)
Kids come home exhausted and then need to
do even more work, rather than relaxing and
enjoying life. Bottom line, we know home-
work creates stress for families. Even if there
are benefits, is it worth it?
A Parent Who Questions the Conventional
Wisdom
Vues Master’s Note: It is interesting that no
one questions your parental conventional wis-
dom. Let the schools and mechanchim decide
what is good, not parents who are only seeing
things through the prism of their own child!
CHESED
Dear Vues Master:
Baruch Hashem, we have many wonderful
chesed organizations that are always ready to
help Klal Yisrael with all different kinds of
needs. Obviously, great care and precaution
must be taken to ensure that these organiza-
tions are run properly.
That being said, there is, Baruch Hashem, no
shortage of people who want to volunteer, and
we can always use more volunteers. The only
thing is that we have to make sure that each
person is capable of doing the job. Unfortu-
nately, sometimes people have to be rejected.
The problem is that instead of those people
realizing that there is a reason they were re-
jected, they go and start their own similar or-
ganization. That defeats the entire purpose of
what these organizations are supposed to
stand for. Instead of being about chesed, it be-
comes about revenge and competition.
Even worse, people fall for it. You have to
wonder: Don’t you realize there is a reason
these people are doing their own thing? What
is wrong with the original organization? Noth-
ing! It’s great!
This is not a business where competition is
necessarily a good thing. It is about chesed. If
you are going to support someone who is run-
ning a “chesed” organization simply out of
competition, then you have a problem—a big
one.
Sadly, we have seen situations where these or-
ganizations have gotten themselves into BIG
trouble. Perhaps these people were never fit
for the job in the first place and were rejected
from the established organization for a reason.
Those people may be a lost cause, but to those
who still fall for them: Wake up! Stop being
naïve and realize what is going on before it’s
too late.
Since we’re on the topic, we can also mention
that when it comes to pikuach nefesh, it is
NOT the time to start being frum. Not every
person is suited for every type of work, and
when lives are at stake, choosing the wrong
person can be extremely dangerous. There is a
lot more to this problem that I’m not going to
get into.
I purposely did not mention the names of
these organizations, but I think I made it very
clear what I’m talking about. It is serious stuff
we’re dealing with, and if people don’t wake
up now, who knows what more can happen?
CF
Vues Master’s Note: Competition makes ev-
erything better!
MINHAG HAMAKOM
Dear Vues Master:
Does the concept of minhag hamakom apply
today? If it does, to what extent? Many times,
I go to shuls and they say that the minhag here
is not to say Tachanun. Should I still say it or
not?
Boruch David
Editor’s Note: This is a question you should
ask your local Orthodox rabbi. It seems that
the concept of minhag hamakom is overused
in many different ways.
SAYING L’DOVID
Dear Vues Master,
Rav Gamliel Rabinowitz writes in Tiv HaE-
munah that Rav Shabsi of Rashkov describes
in his writings on the Siddur the greatness of
saying L’Dovid twice a day from Rosh Ch-
odesh Elul until Simchas Torah.
One who does so is guaranteed that his years
will be found to be good and that it will be
delightful for him. Even if there was an evil
decree written against a person in Shamayim,
saying L’Dovid can cause it to be nullified. All
the different types of prosecuting Malachim
will be removed from upon him, and all harsh
and evil decrees against him will be abolished.
This will allow him to emerge innocent and
exonerated from judgment.
This is because from Rosh Chodesh Elul, the
thirteen wellsprings corresponding to the thir-
teen Attributes of Hashem’s mercy are opened
and flow down to us. It is for this reason that
the merciful Name of Hashem is mentioned
thirteen times in the Perek of L’Dovid.
Vues Master’s Note: During the month of
Elul, we should all be working on improving
ourselves.
SHOWER
Dear Vues Master:
My wife and I always disagree about whether
one should shower on Yom Tov. I know some
rabbis permit showering on Yom Tov, while
others prohibit it. My wife wants me to show-
er because I smell after going a few days
without one, but I never showered on Yom
Tov while growing up. What should I do?
AC
Vues Master’s Note: Chances are it won’t
help!!
AL CHET BY AI
Dear Vues Master,
For the sin we have committed by Allowing
addiction to social media to control our lives.
For the sin we have committed by Broadcast-
ing personal conflicts publicly. For the sin we
have committed by Cyberbullying and harass-
ment. For the sin we have committed by Dis-
seminating fake news and misinformation.
For the sin we have committed by Excessive
selfpromotion and narcissism.
For the sin we have committed by Fostering
online hate and hostility. For the sin we have
committed by Giving in to the allure of click-
bait. For the sin we have committed by Har-
boring envy and jealousy from comparison.
For the sin we have committed by Ignoring
privacy and sharing sensitive information. For
the sin we have committed by Joining in on-
line echo chambers. For the sin we have com-
mitted by Keeping a constant, unhealthy on-
line presence. For the sin we have committed
by Liking, sharing, or endorsing harmful con-
tent.
For the sin we have committed by Misrepre-
senting ourselves online. For the sin we have
committed by Neglecting real-life relation-
ships for virtual ones.
For the sin we have committed by Over-shar-
ing personal details. For the sin we have com-
mitted by Posting hurtful or offensive com-
ments. For the sin we have committed by
Quoting out of context or cherry-picking in-
formation.
For the sin we have committed by Retaliating
against online criticism with hostility. For the
sin we have committed by Spreading rumors
and gossip. For the sin we have committed by
Trolling and provoking others intentionally.
For the sin we have committed by Using so-
cial media as a platform for bragging. For the
sin we have committed by Violating copyright
and intellectual property rights.
For the sin we have committed by Wasting ex-
cessive time on social media. For the sin we
have committed by Xenophobic or prejudiced
remarks online. For the sin we have commit-
ted by Yielding to the pressure of seeking
validation. For the sin we have committed by
Zealously defending one’s online persona,
even at the cost of authenticity. CBT
Vues Master’s Note: Oy! What is this world
coming to?