23 Nov SPEAK YOUR VUES WITH THE VUES MASTER
Please note that the author of Speak Your Vues is in no way affiliated with the publisher of
this paper. The author of this column is an independent third party contributor. The views and
opinions expressed by this author may not reflect the views and opinions of the publishers. If
one has any issues with any of the views, please write a letter to the Vues Master.
THE LOSS OF RAV FEIVEL COHEN ZT”L
Dear Vues Master:
Klal Yisrael mourns the loss of Rabbi Shraga Feivel Cohen
Zts’l, a prominent world-renowned Posek and author of
many seforim including the Badei Hashulchan. I remember
Rabbi Cohen when he was a Rebbe in Yeshivas Chaim
Berlin. Everyone looked up to him. When Rabbi Cohen
was the rabbi of the Kahal Tomchei Torah shul on Ocean
Avenue in Flatbush my family went to him to ask shailos
all the time. He was such a kind & warm talmid chochom.
RBS
Vues Master’s Note:Klal Yisrael definitely lost another one
of their gems. Yehi zichro baruch.
SHIDDUCHIM
Dear Vues Master:
It’s so hard to please anyone these days!!! Here is a
partial list of my clients …. I couldn’t even get them
one date, and that is why I am finally quitting and going
into the pickle business. Avraham Avinu: How can
you recommend him to my daughter? Wasn’t he involved
in a family feud with his father over some idols?
Then he left home without a GPS or a viable business
plan! Yitzchak Avinu: His brother is an Arab terrorist!!!
Rivka Imeinu: Sorry, she seems nice but did you hear
about her mishpucha??? Her father’s a murderer and
her brother’s a ponzi scam artist… . Yaakov Avinu:
Okay, he sits and learns all day… but his brother is a
no-goodnik. And anyway, we heard he has a limp….. .
Leah Imeinu: Her father’s a con artist, and she has ophthalmological
problems. Maybe it’s genetic? Moshe
Rabbeinu: Are you kidding? His parents are divorced!
And worse.. they remarried! And we hear he’s in speech
therapy…. King David: How dare you suggest him to
our yichusdike family? Our neighbor Yenti told us
that his great-grandmother was a giyoret!!! Chava: Do
you know anything about her family? We never heard
of them. No one knows where she came from and she
can’t come up with any referrals! (Please chevra, judge
the person for him/herself – you’re going to marry the
person, not the family as much. You’re getting married
to build your home, not to please your neighbors. And
finally, remember that if you are in this world, you are
not perfect and neither is your spouse)
MR
Vues Master’s Note: We have seen many variations of this
line. The truth hurts!
SHADCHAN II
Dear Vues Master:
A good comeback from a shadchan: There was a woman
who needed a shidduch for her son and called a matchmaker
for help. The shadchan suggested a very qualified
girl from a distinguished family. However she informed
the caller that the grandfather of this girl is a Ger Tzedek (a
convert) The woman paused for a second and then replied,
‘ You know we are descendants of the holy Divrei Chaim(
the Sanzer Rov) who was able to trace his lineage all the
way to King David. I do not think it would be suitable for
us to take a girl who’s ancestor was a ger.’ The shadchan
responded , ‘I’m sure the sainted Divrei Chaim was rightfully
proud of his lineage to the great King David . He was
also aware that the King of Israel was the great grandson
of Ruth the Moabite. She too was a convert, so I maintain
that this is a suitable match:))
SD
Vues Master’s Note: Nu, did it work? Absolutely not, so it
is like talking to the wall!
CHAYEI SARA IN CHEVRON
Dear Vues Master:
I just got back from Eretz Yisrael. I spent Shabbos with
Alan Hirsch in Chevron in Maarat Hamachpela. It was an
experience of a lifetime! To witness 50,000 people davening
Kabbalah Shabbos in the Maarah was something I
will never forget. Wherever you went there in Chevron &
Kiryat Arba it was packed. Saying in Shmonei Esrei the
words Eloke Avraham Elokei Yitzchok, Elokei Yaakov
in Maarat Hamachpela was the most spiritual davening I
ever had. I strongly recommend that everyone should try
at some point in their lifetime to go to Chevron for Parshas
Chayei Sarah.
EB
Vues Master’s Note: Great idea! Can you help me pay for
the ticket?
A TIME FOR MUSIC
Dear Vues Master:
Do you know who is performing this year at the Time for
Music, the Camp HASC concert this year? For the last five
years they hide it from the public and it really drives me
crazy. I know that the concert is going to be great. It always
is. I just hope that this year they get Ishai Ribo to perform.
MN
Vues Master’s Note: Numerous years ago, the people that
produced the HASC concert thought that it would be a
good idea for people to come to the HASC concert to support
Camp HASC and not just because a certain musician
would be there. I’ve been going to the HASC concert for
years & it’s always great, so don’t worry.
WALGREENS CLOSING
Dear Vues Master:
Walgreens closed down recently on Ave J. Do you know what’s replacing it? Ave J used to be the most popular avenue, but over the last ten years the only new stores on Ave J have been banks or pharmacies.
LM
Vues Master’s Note: Do you have any idea how much the rent is on Avenue J these days?
JV SHADCHAN EDITION
Dear Vues Master:
Last week’s Shadchan edition of the Jewish Vues was very entertaining. My family enjoyed all the entire section & especially liked the Paying the Shadchan article, the Dr Jack Cohen articles, & the Boshnacks advice columns. Keep up the good work!
SM
Vues Master’s Note: We love compliments! We had tremendous feedback. Thank You! We hope that at least one shidduch is made because of the articles we had in the paper last week.
POLITICS
Dear Vues Master:
A karbon (sacrificial animal) can’t have a blemish and it was the Kohen who would examine the karbon; they didn’t rely on others to make that determination. Similarly, with cancel-culture out of control, people would do well to check the facts themselves and not rely on others. If someone doesn’t have time to check out the facts then at least follow someone who doesn’t cancel others. Dennis Prager is slow to call someone a racist or antisemite; however, Lex Fridman goes a step further and talks to those canceled; he doesn’t judge people, he judges behavior.
DG
Vues Master’s Note: Politics as usual.
SWEAR
Dear Vues Master:
Two friends, Reuven and Shimon, went to a Bais Din over $500. Reuven said that he had lent the money to Shimon and had not been paid back. The Rav required shimon to swear. He did so and was pattur from paying. As they left, Reuven said to Shimon “For $500, you swore a false shevuah” “And you,” Shimon said, “For $500, you are responsible for causing your friend to make a false shevuah.”
MB
Vues Master’s Note: I think they are both nuts!
HUSBAND BULLETPROOF VEST
Dear Vues Master:
A woman recently approached one of the Batei Din in Israel and asked that it arrange a get from her husband despite the fact that their marriage had been a harmonious one. The woman, in her 40’s and the mother of two children, explained that her husband had run into a credit financing crisis after trying to develop a private business. He was unable to pay his debts to the banks and desperate, he turned to the gray market. However, his business plans continued to fail and he was unable to meet the payments for his debts to the gray market of half a million shekels. When it became clear to the loan sharks that the husband was not meeting their payments, they began to come to his house and threaten him and his family members. The husband was forced to go underground. The woman who realized that her husband’s life was in danger and that she had no means of helping him and that he might also disappear without leaving a trace, asked her husband to bring their marriage to an end. However, her husband did not comply with her request, and shortly later, he disappeared completely. After the judges heard the details of the tragic story, they decided to transfer the case to the Agunot Division under the authority of HaRav Eliyahu Maimon. Employees of the Agunot Division utilized technological means and intelligence to locate the husband and establish contact with him. At first, the husband refused to cooperate and eventually cut off contact with the Beis Din. Rabbanim then contacted the husband’s relatives with whom he maintained a close relationship and explained to them that the Beis Din had no interest in harming the husband or discovering his hiding place but was only interested in releasing his wife via a get. After several conversations, the husband was convinced to cooperate but refused to announce where and when the meeting would be held for the purpose of granting the get. In the end, a date was agreed on when the get would be granted, and a team from the Agunot Division set out with a general direction but without prior knowledge of the location of the meeting. While the team was traveling, a contact person who mediated between the team and the husband, notified the team of the location for the signing but then proceeded to change the destination three times in a journey that lasted several hours. Finally, the Beis Din team met the husband, who was wearing a bulletproof vest out of fear for his life and obtained his signature for the get. The husband refused to meet with more than two members of the team, which precluded the presence of eidim, a sofer, and dayanim. Therefore, the two team members had the husband sign authorizations for the sofer to write a get for his wife and a shalich to transfer the get to his wife’s hands. As soon as the team members returned to the Beis Din, the get was written and transferred to the wife. The director of the Rabbinical Batei Din, HaRav Eli Ben-Dahan, said: “The Batei Din and the Agunot Division use creative, innovative and bold methods to find solutions and don’t avoid any effort required to save a woman from her agunus, even in cases where they grapple with professional challenges.”
RBS
Vues Master’s Note: It is sad but sometimes necessary!
PARENT
Dear Vues Master:
I will greatly bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars of the sky and like the sand on the seashore. Your descendants will inherit the gate of their enemies. Berashis 22:17 Kli Yakar says: “I will greatly bless you,” is a double blessing – one corresponding to the act (of slaughtering the ram) and one corresponding to the thought (when he was slaughtering the ram, he had Yitzchok in mind). In the old days the father was blessed when he did right but today it is the opposite; society blesses the son and sacrifices the father. The Torah is teaching the correct way, the father must raise his son on the proper path, even if it means to “sacrifice” him for his own good. The Hebrew word koof, raish, bais hints to this; if the son treats his dad like a father he is a korev (relative) but if he treats him like a stranger he becomes a karbon (sacrifice). Both words have the same root and it all depends on the son’s behavior. The father isn’t responsible for the survival of the seed; he is there to make sure he is properly planted and nurtured. A mature son is responsible for making a relationship with his father, staying close to him and adding to the orchard by producing his own fruit. However, If he chooses to grow up alone he will be dependent on others, who may need firewood. My rabbi, Rav Shlomo Brevda, said that in Europe if the parents saw that their child had to choose between doing an averah (sin) or giving up their life they would want him to give up his life but in America, they would want him to do the averah.
DG
Vues Master’s Note: You always write about this topic..
DRAFT
Dear Vues Master:
Young Jews drafted into the Russian army during the reign of Czar Nicholas the First were required to serve for twenty years, during which the army did whatever it could to convert the Jewish boys. When a group of boys came to Reb Dov of Lubavitch, he blessed them with a bracha that they should return to their homes in peace and remain yehudim kesheirim and nemanim. “And what should we do if they require us to eat treife meat?” one of the boys asked. The Rebbe sighed and said: “Try not to eat it, but if it gets to the stage of sakonos nefashos, then ones rachmana patrei. Eating treife is not something which comes under yaharog ve’al yaavor. But the one thing I ask of you is: don’t lick the bones.”
BM
Vues Master’s Note:I bet you they licked their chops with that answer!
MACHLOKES
Dear Vues Master:
Thank you for your publication that brings unity to the Jewish world. We enjoy a wide range of holy topics and Torah thoughts with unsurpassed brilliance. I gained a deep appreciation for our Rabbis and to revere them and our tradition and the ikrim of emunah- foundations of our Faith. I was dismayed that the news contained two articles that seemed to bring division or a reason to dislike or look down on those people or groups spoken about. We are a family, and it wouldn’t be fair that political views or different views should break our family. If someone said something like this about us, we would not like it. These words: “declared war” “wasted no time” made it especially difficult to maintain a positive belief in our brothers. One can say that we like to know such news for curiosity purpose. I have read “There is no physical, material or spiritual benefits to be gained from knowing what others think about” (you). Where is the constructive purpose? On the one hand, your publication contains beautiful photographs of all the Jewish Spectrum, and this stands in contrast to the machlokes or criticism in the two articles. As a suggestion, I would suggest that news can contain healthcare breakthroughs, special occasions, like siyumim, and general world news.
Thank you, Hope to continue reading inspiring Jewish Vues
Vues Master’s Note: It is sad but a fact of life!
POEM
Dear Vues Master:
First they came for fathers
and I did not speak out
because I wasn’t a father.
Then they came for property
and I did not speak out
because I room in a dorm.
Then they came for livelihood
and I did not speak out
because I had no job.
Then they came for me
and there was no one left
to speak out for me.
DG
Vues Master’s Note: I would say speak for yourself but you can’t!
DOG
Dear Vues Master:
David came to Shul with his Saint Bernard dog. When the Rabbi saw him, he said: “What are you doing coming to Shul with a dog?” David answered: “He came to pray. Watch, he’s opening his Tallis bag. Look he’s putting on the Tallis and starting to pray in lashon Hakodesh.” The Rabbi looked and listened and couldn’t believe what he was witnessing. “Do you think he’s interested in going to Yeshiva and becoming a Rabbi?” the Rav asked. “You talk to him,” David responded. “He won’t listen to me. He insists that he wants to be a doctor.”
NB
Vues Master’s Note: He probably voted Democrat!
LOCATION
Dear Vues Master:
Location, Location, Location Yaakov bought land in Shchem to house his entire family and all the animals he owned. He paid for it 100 kesita. Rashi says a kesita & a maah are the same. A Shekel has 24 maah. Therefore, Yakov paid 100 maah that was just slightly more than 4 Shekel. Avraham bought the Meoras Hamachpeila which probably wasn’t larger than the property in Shchem, yet he paid 400 shkalim one hundred times more than Yaakov.
FM
Vues Master’s Note: Sounds like modern day real estate. As much as things change, they stay the same!.
HAPPY 80TH PRESIDENT BIDEN
Dear Vues Master:
It is one of the most replayed moments in the history of presidential debates. Standing on a stage in Kansas City in October 1984, President Ronald Reagan was asked the question that was on most everyone’s mind. He was the oldest president ever, and had been described as being “very tired” after an earlier debate. Did he have any questions in his mind about his ability to function if deprived of sleep during a national security crisis? Reagan, 73 at the time, said, “Not at all.” And, after scowling for a moment, he submitted to a flicker of a smile as he added, “I will not make age an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit — for political purposes – my opponent’s youth and inexperience.” This past week was President Biden’s 80th birthday. I think we should have a rule that once a President becomes 80 they have to retire.
JT
Vues Master’s Note: Oy vey! Do you realize that if Biden runs for a second term and wins he would be 86 years old when he’s done?
MATCHMAKER
Dear Vues Master:
Your last issue had an entire section on shidduchim with experts answering questions, addressing problems, or reviewing halachos. Isn’t it time to hear from those who don’t normally have a voice? Let me introduce you to “Unmatched” by Sarah Lavane. With her sometimes funny, always intimate uncensored memoir Sarah Lavane puts a human face on the challenges of being “unmatched” in a “matched” Orthodox Jewish world. She takes us along on the journey of her single life. We learn how her background shaped her relationships and perceptions of God from a young age. She then delves into the ups and downs of dating, the tug-of-war she feels between men she may date and those who are off-limits, her heartfelt attempts (conventional and not) to change her fate and her poignant struggles with God through it all. Thoughtful and humorous, this page-turner draws the reader in. “Unmatched” aims to bring solace and comfort to the “unmatched” as well as foster sensitivity and awareness to the “matched.” This memoir is a must-read for the currently “unmatched,” anyone who’s ever wondered, “Why isn’t so-and-so married?” and readers who enjoy memoirs that give insight into the human condition. A newspaper in New Jersey voted it as one of its 6 Best Books of 5782. Find out why! I encourage every expert, dating coach, parent, friend, married or single person to check out unmatchedstory.com Thank you so much!
S.L.
Vues Master’s Note: Oy! A depressing topic!.
ELECTIONS
Dear Vues Master:
As Bibi Netanyahu begins forming the next Israeli government following his victory in the latest Knesset election, some on the left have begun a last-ditch effort to prevent him from forming a coalition with the parties that ran as his allies. Their argument is that anything must be done to keep the Religious Zionist Party and especially Itamar Ben-Gvir out of power. Barring an unlikely last-minute change of heart on the part of either Yair Lapid or Benny Gantz—whose parties fell short in the election and who have pledged to go into opposition rather than serve with Netanyahu—the jeremiads about the necessity of stopping Ben-Gvir and Bezalel Smotrich, the titular leader of the Religious Zionists, out of the Cabinet are falling on deaf ears among those who could actually do something about it. Yet while Israeli politicians are ignoring these arguments, that won’t be the last we’ll hear of them. That’s because they will provide the foundation for renewed efforts to delegitimize Israel’s government abroad. While the supposedly substantive reasons for excluding the Religious Zionists don’t withstand serious scrutiny, this discussion matters because of the claim that Israel’s leaders will be undermining and even endangering Jews in the Diaspora. As the leader of the Conservative movement of Judaism in Israel put it in Haaretz, having Smotrich and Ben-Gvir around the cabinet table won’t just impact life in Israel. It will also hurt Jews elsewhere. Citing a much-discussed New York Times column by Thomas Friedman, Yizhar Hess claimed that a right-wing government will mean that Jewish students, already under siege by anti-Zionists, will no longer be able to credibly speak up on behalf of the Jewish state. That’s because the presence of these so-called “fascists” in Netanyahu’s cabinet will, in this telling, mean that the “good Israel,” that nice Jews feel comfortable about defending, is now either gone or about to be legislated out of existence. In its place will be a different country, run by extremists and horrible people who oppose peace and want to oppress minorities. Even if the people in this new bad Israel will be Jews, they will be the sort of Jews no self-respecting American Jew will want to be associated with. In this scenario, the new government will mean that Jewish kids as well as the activists who have formed the backbone of organized Jewish life will be effectively silenced. And those who continue to advocate for Israel will be increasingly regarded as outliers who will themselves deserve to be shunned. Those who will try to preserve the U.S.-Israel relationship as well as the one between American Jews and the Jewish state will now be forced to become part of a new “resistance” to Netanyahu’s government, in which they will advocate for American pressure that will help resurrect the “good” Israel. The main problem with this gloomy scenario is that everything that the doomsayers are claiming that the new government will mean for Israel in America is already true about the Jewish state’s critics. Everything that can be alleged about Smotrich and Ben-Gvir has already been aired out endlessly by left-wing critics of Israel in their efforts to undermine and delegitimize past Israeli governments including those run by the Israeli left. For decades, left-wingers have been falsely claiming that Israel’s governments didn’t want peace and that the decisions of Israel’s voters should be either ignored or overridden by American governments that took up the cause of “saving Israel from itself.” Let’s remember that J Street, the left-wing lobby which has dedicated itself to that dubious cause, came into existence in 2007. Netanyahu’s Likud was in the opposition and a government led by Ehud Olmert was engaged in yet another futile attempt to trade land for peace with Palestinian Authority leader Mahmoud Abbas. When Netanyahu became prime minister again in 2009 and in the 12 years that followed, when there was no thought of Ben-Gvir being a minister, the same arguments about Israeli policies being oppressive and alienating American Jews were heard over and over again. During this time, as the anti-Semitic BDS movement gain footholds on American college campuses and on the left-wing of the Democratic Party, there was no talk about Ben-Gvir or the evils of Israel being governed by right-wing and religious parties. To the contrary, the so-called centrists of Israeli politics—Lapid and Gantz—were just as reviled by those who spread the “apartheid state” smear as Smotrich and Ben-Gvir are today. The same claims about a mythical old “good” Israel being destroyed were made by those who opposed Netanyahu. Those who think one Jewish state on the planet is one too many didn’t need Religious Zionists in Israel’s cabinet to be convinced that Israel shouldn’t exist. American Jews who are embarrassed by Ben-Gvir and Smotrich were already embarrassed by Netanyahu and even some of his left-leaning opponents in the Knesset. Their failure to magically make the conflict with the Palestinians disappear has been cited by those who note a decline in support for Israel in the years since the collapse of the Oslo peace process, and even before that while the delusion that it might succeed was still alive. This goes beyond the fact that the claims that Smotrich and Ben-Gvir are fascists is without real substance. As I’ve noted previously, the talk about the winners of last week’s election being enemies of democracy is just an echo of the Democratic Party talking points about Republicans in the U.S. and just as specious. Whatever one may think of either man, their party doesn’t oppose democracy. None of that matters because this discussion isn’t rooted in the facts about Israel or those who will make up its next government. Rather, it is an expression of unease with the reality of a Jewish state that must deal with a messy and insoluble conflict with the Palestinians as well as one where the majority of its Jews don’t think or look like your typical liberal Jewish Democrat. Israel-haters will work for its destruction no matter who is its prime minister or the composition of the government. As has always been the case, the anti-Semites don’t need any new excuses for their efforts to besmirch and delegitimize the Jewish state. One needn’t support Netanyahu or his partners to understand any of this. Rather than apologizing for Ben-Gvir or the other aspects of Israeli reality that make readers of The New York Times cringe, those who care about the Jewish state and its people need to stop longing for an Israel which looks like them and embrace the one that actually exists. By buying into the disingenuous claims that this government will be less worthy of their support than its predecessors, they are merely falling into a trap set for them by anti-Semites. Those who support the right of a Jewish state to exist should stop apologizing for it not conforming to some idealized liberal vision of Zionism, and understand that the people who voted for Netanyahu and Ben-Gvir are just as deserving of respect and representation as they are.
JNS
Vues Master’s Note: Until we have the next elections! We are now used to annual Israeli Elections!
BASHERT
Dear Vues Master:
Everything in life is Bashert* except for your spouse, who is not necessarily your Basherte** The Chasam Sofer (Shu”t O. Ch. 55) writes, the reason we don’t say Shehecheyanu when getting married, is because the Bracha of Shecheyanu is said only when buying a new fruit or utensil etc. which it is totally dependent on the Ratzon (will) of Hashem. Hashem had in mind you should buy this fruit, and you have no choice to change it for another one. Whereas a Shidduch if one decides not to marry his Basherte, Hashem will not interfere with his choice and will not force him to get married. Where the will of humans is also involved in the acquisition, no Shehecheyanu is recited. The Chasam Sofer is not concerned with the Chazal that says “40 days before yetziras havlad – bas ploni liploni.”
MF
Vues Master’s Note: That is why you are allowed to get engaged on Chol Hamoed as “Shema Yekadmenu Achar.”